"There are two types of
people who go bowling: there are the
people that really, really
love bowling, and then there are the
people that are like 'wouldn't it be hysterical if we went bowling?'"
"Well, we could go bowling...or we could just hang ourselves..."
"Oh, you went bowling? Glad I couldn't make it."
"If you're sweating while you're bowling, you're out of shape. And if you're out of shape and you're bowling, you're probably a professional bowler."
"Here, put on these moist shoes ten thousand people have worn, and stick your fingers in these dirty holes. Now you have the flu."
-Jim Gaffigan