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Blinding the dolphin

Having a wank over the railing of the boat so you jizz into the water.

Originally "Blinding the dolphin" was an old ancient pirate sport, as they drank a lot of rum and were horny, but didn't want to have pirate bum sex if there weren't any wenches to plough like a cornfield.

They decided it would be best to just give themselves the old low five, but in good ol' fashioned pirate tradition, were drunk and had fun with it, and had a competition to see who could unload a love shot into a jumping dolphin's mouth.

However, due to the Charlie Sheen like state one pirate was in, he ended up jizz blinding a dolphin, and thus the sport evolved into this turbo event.

Nowadays, seeing as it's illegal to jizz in a dolphin's eye as PETA will cry stinky tears, soak their arms in Kerosene and fist fuck themselves in the ass, the term is now used to express the activity of wanking into the sea to prevent a cum-based sealant in the toilet at sea.
Guy 1: "Man, all this boating is making me stressed, I'm gonna go wank!"

Guy 2: "You're better off blinding the dolphin, or you'll clog the shitter with man mayo."

Guy 1: "What's that?"

Guy 2: "Like this..." *Blinds the dolphin*

Guy 1: "I think I'll join you, looks fun!"

*Both blind the dolphin*
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Blinding the Merlin 

So Fanboys made you curious about this one too?
"That's what you do, you aim for the eye, grab the lip, and lead her around the room. Blinding the Merlin."
Blinding the Merlin by hWnd85 December 8, 2010

Blinding the Gods 

Noun:
Masturbating during church and busting your load all over either the priest or a statue of Jesus.
I got banned from most Catholic churches because I keep blinding the gods with my excessive discharge

blinding the pirates parrot 

blinding the pirates parrot is when a guy is jacking off and plans on cumming on his stomache but shoots harder than he expected and his sperm shoots over his shoulder just missing his face
man1:I was wanking it this morning and got lucky i guess 'cause i endded up blinding the pirates parrot.

man2:I wasn't so lucky I gave myself a zombie.....

Blinding Fury 

When you jerk off but the release is harder and quicker than you expect so it gets all in your eyes and on your face.
Joey wouldn't have gone blind had he masturbated safely and not had a blinding fury.
Blinding Fury by Pro-Win April 5, 2015

Blinding lights 

When you cum in a flash light and tell her to look inside then your seaman will enter her eye
Babe do you wanna try blinding lights tonight
Blinding lights by Dickout6inch February 27, 2021

blinding stew 

Stew that blinds people for 24 hours, One day blinding stew that you feed to your children to stop them biting hair by blinding them for a day.
Dave: "my daughter is biting my hair what do I do?"
Lynda, Georgia, Rebecca, rei, and lizzy: "feed her blinding stew that makes her blind for 1 day"