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Umbilical condom

When after birth, the umbilical cord is saved preserved with preservatives from a bag of beef jerky or similar preservatives, kept moist then stretched, put on your penis then masterbaited into.
Yo, I just used an umbilical condom!

Car condom

A condom that you keep in your car for when you feel the need to masturbate in the car but don’t want to cleanup with your sock or towel
When I’m on a long drive, I make sure I use a car condom so I keep any mess contained in the condom
Car condom by Daddy djinn April 29, 2026

snug fit condom 

1. Smaller size condoms for smaller size men.

2. Small condoms for men so it won't slip off the penis like a regular size one does.
1. He bought a snug fit condom. I realized why when he took off his pants in bed.

2. Girl - "what's wrong?"

Guy - "the condom slipped off"

Girl - "how did that happened?"

Guy - "You gave me a regular size condom. I usually wear a snug fit condom so it won't slip off"
snug fit condom by boiwithsmall September 21, 2013

dirty sock condom 

A dirty sock condom is the condom that has been in the bottom of your sock drawer since your dad gave it to you during your freshman year of high school.
"Sorry I used a dirty sock condom last night. It was all I had."

darth vader condom 

A condom with darth vader on it and once slipped into the vagina the male will not be the father
Girl: have you got protection

Boy: I got that darth vader condom

Girl: YOU ARE NOT THE FATHER

Golf Ball Condom 

A condom filled with golf balls. Cheaper than buying a wavy dildo.
Girl my Golf Ball Condoms works better than my dildo.