Pissing in the sink instead of the toilet. An act which saves water and is therefore good for the planet but enrages women
purely because they can't do it due to their defective chromosomes
, causing them to make ridiculous claims such as "it's disgusting" when we all know that urine
is sterile as it leaves the body.
"You better not be doing a sinkpiss again!"
"I pay the water
bill bitch so until you let me put a urinal
in the bathroom I'm sinkpissing!"
Every woman on the face of the earth, plus any that happen to be in space right now.
"Stacey and me were so close when we were at primary, but then she hit puberty and now she's like a snake with tits."
The most epic porn star the world has ever seen. Hardcore wasn't good enough for her, no no, she had to invent supercore. Belladonna was top turkey for a long time, but then Audrey came along, crapped cum into her own mouth and swallowed it. Nobody can top that.
"If you could sleep with anyone, living or dead, who would you sleep with?"
"Audrey Hollander. Alive."
An ingenious engine design which avoids the reciprocal motion of the piston engine and manages to incorporate the suck, squeeze, bang, blow of internal combustion engines into a rotating piston.
Not a torture device of any kind.
The Wankel rotary engine is far more efficient than the latest hybrid cars, but nobody will buy one because it sounds too much like "wanker".
1) Taking mind altering substances right before a wordy exam that requires you to express an opinion - such as philosophy or english literature, enhancing your ability to plumb the depths of the mind and/or lowering your inhibitions enough to say what you really think, whilst either enhancing or diminishing your ability to actually write it down.
2) Letting your mate be the first to sample the latest batch of drugs you have acquired, by pretending that you have all already taken some and the effects are really good, whereas in fact you suspect you have just been sold half a kilo of caustic soda.
3) A test performed by people in authority who are too scared to take drugs, in order to see if any of their employees are actually any fun outside of work.
1) I can't believe I got an A in religious studies, I scored some bud an hour before the exam and had a sly toke to keep me calm but it just made me so much more able to refute things eloquently.
2) Dave! Long time no see, fancy a line? This is great stuff man I've been on it for weeks.
3) "All employees will have a drug test on Monday"
"Um, I'm the regional manager, have never had a bad review, got promoted twice last year and brought in 6 new accounts this month already. And I take drugs. My team are the most useless bunch of monkeys who ever came down from the trees and none of them take drugs. What exactly is the point of this test?"
"All employees will have a drug test on Monday"
Something that men have 24 kinds of whereas women have just 23. Although women
have two X chromosomes while men
have one X and one Y, one of the women's X chromosomes is "transcriptionally silent" i.e. completely inactive.
The Y chromosome is the sole distinguishing factor between men and women and therefore the home of the genes
and abilities such as parking
, understanding maps
, inventing humourous jokes
or indeed anything useful, using an ATM
in 30 seconds or less and not turning into a blubbering mess when something trivial occurs, like a parent's death
"Have you seen The Sarah Silverman
Show? She is one funny ass chick!"
"Yeah but she's literally the ONLY one, makes me kinda suspicious about them chromosomes."
1) Someone who loves themselves so much that masturbation isn't enough self-love for them, so they publicise their imaginary greatness by appearing on reality TV shows, or failing that, add entries to definition websites describing people with their name as somehow better than everyone else. See also: narcissist.
2) Basically the same as 1) above but a narcissist who, having had their pride bruised by someone, decides it is a mature and reasonable course of action to define aforementioned person on a definition website with details of said infidelity plus various fabrications about their sexual and/or culinary desires. Someone who publicly blames their own inadequacies on someone else.
I was on Urban Dictionary last night voting on the latest definitions, and I couldn't believe how many wankers there were trying to big themselves up or put someone down.