When you have to take a poo ... Really bad, but don't have access to a bathroom. The poo pokes out of your butthole as you try to sqeeze it back in so you don't shit your pants. Much like the way a turtles head peeks in and out of it's shell.
Often you can tell if one is turtle heading because they will walk funny, from the effort it takes to keep from shitting their pants
Dude1: wow look that guy is walking funny!!
Dude2: hahaha yeah he's definitely turtle heading !!!
Voluptuous lumps on a woman's chest, if they are big and bouncy ...well then you got the tool to seduce and man into whatever you want him to do
Girl: hey babe can you get me a smoothie
Guy: ugh do I have to
Girl( comes out shirtless letting her massive boobs bounce near her boyfriends face ): please babe for me I'll let you touch my boobs later
Guy: WHERES THE FUCKING KEYS!!!!
Anything with a vagina and a pulse..... Or just a vagina
Dude: DAYYYYYUM she so fine. I'd fuck dat pussy all day
Dude2: yeah man she so damn fuckable id fuck her dead
Masturbating !!!!! Making yourself orgasm using your hand... In some ways it's better then sex because you can give it to yourself just the way you like it
I made sweet hand love to myself while reading definitions of horny
on urban dictionary(;
I used an asswipe to wipe my ass
1)who's that douche
2)oh that's JD
21. Men like women to be into the same things they are into, but don't pretend to be Into the same things. Women don't expect men to like doing nails.
22. Men like to do things first before women. It makes them feel more important.
23. Men have higher body temperatures than women. Men are like portable heaters that snore.
24.If a man says, "I'll call you," and he doesn't, he didn't forget...he didn't lose your number...he didn't die. He just didn't want to call you.
25. Men compartmentalize everything. This means that is something doesn't fit into one of their brain catigories, they freak out and can't handle it.
26. Men only orgasm once during sex. Sucks for you
27. All men watch porn and masturbate, this is considered cool. Most women do to but won't admit it because it's ok for a man but shameful for a women.
28. Men are impatient. This means they hate it if women take a long time to get ready. But really it's their fault because they set up all these standards for how a woman should look.
29. Men think they are smarter then women and have them figured out. Women just let them think that because if they really understood the complexity of being a woman their tiny stupid male brains would explode.
30. Men want to date a whore but marry an innocent virgin.
50 facts about men continued.