13 definitions by Roger Mellie 84

Sticking two fingers up at somebody, flicking Vs.

A reference to the Norman invasion of England. When the Normans captured Anglo-Saxon archers, they would cut the archer's index and middle fingers off.

So as a act of defiance, unmolested Anglo-Saxon archers would rebelliously stick those two fingers up at the Normans.
He was being really haughty with me, so I said "up yours" and gave him an Anglo-Saxon salute.
by Roger Mellie 84 December 12, 2008
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The opposite of the Midas touch. A person for whom everything turns to crap, if (s)he gets involved.

Named after jewellery magnate Gerald Ratner, who infamously declared his proudcts to be "total crap" and wouldn't last much "longer than a M&S {Marks & Spencer} prawn sandwich", during a speech to the Insitute of Directors (1991).

Although his comments were meant to be tongue-in-cheek, shares in his company drastically plummeted and he almost bankrupted the company. The speech is often heralded as an example of the value of branding and image over quality.
It's a nightmare working with with Cheryl, she always bodges things up-- she's got the Ratner's touch.
by Roger Mellie 84 October 31, 2009
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A cult scale that some British gay men use to assess the cuteness or 'hotness' of a potentially attractive man in their presence. It runs from zero to ten.

The scale is named after gay sex-symbol, the Polish-born BBC meteorologist Tomasz Schafernaker. The scale his named after him, since his cuteness is commonly considered to be beyond 10.
"Brad Pitt gets a 10 on the Schafernaker scale from me"
"You're not wrong there... whereas Gordon Brown or John McCririck would get 0 from me"
by Roger Mellie 84 October 09, 2009
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Acronym= "So CRap It's Good". Something that is so naff, tasteless or of poor quality; it has kitsch value or cult status.
"I used to love watching Bullseye on a Sunday evening, it was scrig"
by Roger Mellie 84 January 17, 2008
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A deep-brown or orange tan. Named after the Marshall Islands, where the first H-bombs were tested.

The implication being that the tanned person, looks as though (s)he has been in the presence of a thermonuclear detonation.
I see Clive has been out in the sun. He's got a right Marshall Islands tan on him!
by Roger Mellie 84 June 02, 2009
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adj. Dead, deceased.

From Cockney rhyming slang: Brown bread=dead. Hovis is noted for producing wholemeal bread.
"If your parachute doesn't open at 10,000 feet-- you'll be hovis"
by Roger Mellie 84 January 17, 2008
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A lesbian woman. Named after the comfortably-shod Canadian chanteuse, KD Lang. Who is yet to find herself the right man
"I used to love Sam Fox in the 1980s, I dreamt about marrying her"
"No chance mate, she's a KD lady"
by Roger Mellie 84 October 13, 2008
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