56 definition by Robert Lanham, Author of Food Court Druids, Cherohonkees, and Other Creatures Unique to the Republic

People who walk around in normal society dressed in the full uniform of their favorite sports team.
The Unitard is a sports fashion aficionado who takes his love of sportswear to an extreme level.

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An Active career mom who doesn't have time for sports, save an occasional visit to the gym.
The Treadmill Mom picks up her kids from soccer practice when time allows, but generally leaves it up to her husband

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HomoFabs suggest that they're not homophobic since they watch Queer Eye for the Straight Guy.
HomoFabs are similar to people who claim not to be racists by saying "I have lots of black friends."

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Children who say racially and religiously insensitive things by mistake.
Some Blurts shout out, "Look, she's having a baby," when encountering someone with a weight problem.

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Backstabbing employees whose inflated ambitions and obsessions with work cause people not to like them and sabotages their chances for advancement
Alpha Weasels are often too consumed by their ambitions to have a life beyond the walls of the office.

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Family members with shifty eyes and overly friendly hugs who discover their affectionate side when their cousins and nieces buy their first training bra.
Whereas flirtatious grandpas are usually written off as being harmless, Twister Uncles sometimes require a tongue-lashing from Cousin Willy.

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Laymen paparazzi who commonly spot people who look "just like" celebrities at the mall, church, and Applebee's.
Page Eighty-Sixers point to random people they encounter in public and say, "Doesn't that person look just like Colin Farrell?"

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