56 definition by Robert Lanham, Author of Food Court Druids, Cherohonkees, and Other Creatures Unique to the Republic

a boss who is like a parent who gives preferential treatment to a child
Favorcrats think Mary should be able to come in a bit late since she works so hard.

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maturity level stunted at age 16; live for the weekends and the drunken revelry they associate with it
The Maxim-subscribing office pervert

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the quietest person in the office during the workday, but after a couple of drinks at the company picnic she's ready to lean over a balcony Mardi Gras-style and take her top off for Girls Gone Wild
Dry Lumps are shy and 100 percent business until one drop of booze transforms her like a shot of Jekyll's formula.

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Gay men who accessorize with tiny dogs to help pull their wardrobe together.
Chihuamos often own bulldogs, shih tzus, pugs, Jack Russell terriers, and other pint-sized to small dogs.

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A person who considers it their role to show children how the world really operates.
On the rare occasion that the children are left in the care of a Dog Track Brother-In-Law, he must be reminded that the kids can absolutely not smoke.

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Similar to soccer moms, only they have lesbian haircuts
After having children, Soccer Lillies simply stop worrying about their appearance.

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Airheaded women who flirt with men because they have nothing else to say
Flairheads have always been physically desirable and therefore never felt the need to develop a personality of their own.

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