This is where you move to when you hate
monogamy but love your
Subaru. 😍
I’m bored with my spouse. I’m buying an Outback and moving to Asheville, NC.
This is a person who accuses another person of being on
Tinder, when that person presumed they were in an exclusive relationship, even though the only way that person could know that, was because they were on Tinder themselves.
Person 1: Oh, guess what?, I saw you on tinder today.... I thought we were a couple?
Person 2: Oh my God, you're such a hyptindercrite!
Buy a
Hyptindercrite
mug!
It’s what you can use to receive an unfiltered message from the President of the United States.
Did he really say that?
Look on Twitter. Judge for yourself. 🤪
When hipsters make a place so cool that all the other hipsters flock there. The original hipsters then have no place to park their Subarus, and they are usually mad about it.
Hey, I know that we were going to go to that new place that graciously serves you 10 ounces of sour crafty beer for five dollars, but the hipsterdeparkification is pissing me off, so let's go somewhere else....
Buy a
Hipsterdeparkification
mug!
When you and your current partner hate each other so much, but lack the skills and energy required for a normal affair.
Yes, I would love to watch Netflix with you . Just come on over....we have a large TV in a tiny house in the backyard. My husband won't mind . We are polyamorous.
This party is just another way for parents to possibly
capitalize off of procreating. It also robs their friends of weekend opportunities. When put together with the baby shower and the baby's first birthday, the parents are now guaranteed more attention and gifts with this new
trifecta. This party is also politically incorrect for modern times, since the baby has not even been born yet; hence the baby has had no time to ponder about what gender it wants to be.
Person 1: Hey!, Do you want to go do something fun today?
Person 2: I wish! I have to go to another gender reveal party. :-(
Buy a
Gender Reveal Party
mug!
This is a modern disease/eating trend in which the consumer strongly believes that by consuming a mostly plant-based diet.... that it will somehow negate all the risk factors involved in also consuming a ridiculous amount of alcohol.
His doctor told him he needed a liver transplant, but Kalecoholism was big in his family, so he just added more greens to his smoothies. He knew better.
