2 definitions by Cum Prepared
When you blow a huge, extra salty load all over someone's face. In additional to being extra salty, in order to qualify as a Salty Storm, the ejaculate must meet at least two of the following standards:
1. Ejaculate must be fast enough to be able to leave the penis and travel the distance of at least 14 inches, before the female can close her eyes. (Note: accuracy is not a factor. The Salty Storm need not enter the eye)
2. The ejaculate covers a total surface area of at least 10 square inches
3. The ejaculate spans the distance (between any two points) of at least 4 feet
4. The ejaculate causes substantial physical or property damage to anyone or anything in the immediate area. Be advised, if this standard is met, you may consider upgrading to a Salticane
1. Ejaculate must be fast enough to be able to leave the penis and travel the distance of at least 14 inches, before the female can close her eyes. (Note: accuracy is not a factor. The Salty Storm need not enter the eye)
2. The ejaculate covers a total surface area of at least 10 square inches
3. The ejaculate spans the distance (between any two points) of at least 4 feet
4. The ejaculate causes substantial physical or property damage to anyone or anything in the immediate area. Be advised, if this standard is met, you may consider upgrading to a Salticane
Man: "Get ready bitch!! I ate about two and a half orders of large fries from McDonalds earlier! Here comes a Salty Storm you won't forget!"
by Cum Prepared November 5, 2015
For reference, see: Salty Storm
A Salticane is an upgrade from a Salty Storm. A Salticane is cum that is so thick and salty that it yields a high probability of causing great bodily harm, death, or total property loss upon direct impact. A Salticane may also cause mild - moderate damage to other persons or property in close range. A Salticane may cause damage to the penis of the man launching to Salticane. Additionally, anyone within 50 feet of the Salticane should seek shelter as soon as possible.
A Salticane is an upgrade from a Salty Storm. A Salticane is cum that is so thick and salty that it yields a high probability of causing great bodily harm, death, or total property loss upon direct impact. A Salticane may also cause mild - moderate damage to other persons or property in close range. A Salticane may cause damage to the penis of the man launching to Salticane. Additionally, anyone within 50 feet of the Salticane should seek shelter as soon as possible.
Doctor: "What is wrong today, sir?"
Man: "I had a huge Salticane last night...My girlfriend is dead, my house is a mess, and worst of all my penis ruptured. Think I will ever have a girlfriend again?"
Doctor: "Not with that messed up cock"
Man: "I had a huge Salticane last night...My girlfriend is dead, my house is a mess, and worst of all my penis ruptured. Think I will ever have a girlfriend again?"
Doctor: "Not with that messed up cock"
by Cum Prepared November 5, 2015