3 definitions by Bevets' Mom

Top Definition
Budding religion being promoted by illiterate teenagers on the internet. Based around the movie The Matrix. Practicioners believe the real world is a hoax that's being pulled on us by robots, space aliens, or multinational corporations depeding on which one you ask. The key to open the door to perception is often thought to be acid, mushrooms, or some other drug. Because if the hippies taught us anything, they taught us that all the stuff you see on acid is real and makes perfect sense. Hey, good luck with that, guys.

There are several interesting parallels between the Matrix movies and the New Testament, however:

-In both cases, they start off with a somewhat reluctant Messiah figure who somehow transcends mortality before whizzing off into space (end of the first Matrix movie, Jesus' bodily assumption into heaven).

-Said Messiah figure says many interesting things, such as "Blessed are the meek" (New Testament), or "Whoa" (The Matrix).

-Both the Matrix movies and the New Testament start out well but eventually meander off into a disorganized pile of crap into which the authors threw every half-assed idea they could think of.

-Both end with a denouement that makes absolutely no sense and is completely unsatisfying.

Given the success of New Testament Christianity, Matrixism may well have what it takes to be a contender on the world's religious stage.
"Hello, sir! May I come in and talk to you about how Neo and Matrixism have changed my life? No? Oh well, Oracle bless you anyway."
by Bevets' Mom January 29, 2006
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Someone lacking the wit necessary for the SomethingAwful forums who likes to hang out with other knuckledragging, adolescent semiliterates. Poor spelling, poor Photoshop skills, and a complete lack of a sense of humor are a must, and it helps to be twice as opinionated as you are informed about any particular issue. It's also essential that you don't mind seeing the same retarded cliche catchphrases and images posted over and over again; these people haven't seen a new joke in years, and wouldn't recognize one if it showed up.

You would get banned from the SA forums for being as unfunny and ignorant as the best poster on Fark.
"Did you see that the sixth grade kid who fell off the monkeybars and landed on his head is finally back in school this year? Word has it that the brain damage was so severe that he's become a farker."
by Bevets' Mom July 04, 2005
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Yet another one of those words that were made up by advertising executives to put into the mouth of today's supposed youth for the purposes of selling crap that's made to seem "extreme". "This sounds like the kind of stupid crap kids would say", they said, and apparently they were right. The use of this word in any context is admissible in most courts as evidence that the speaker is a complete fucking idiot.
"Have you heard of 'steezy'? It's yet another bullshit synonym for 'cool' that can be used to make old products seem new somehow!"
by Bevets' Mom December 30, 2005
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