11 definition by Barnaby J.

Top Definition
1. Any group of people that generally lack talent, humor, modesty, intelligence, or any related qualities of otherwise normal people.

2. Used as a slightly less meaningful but more conversationally appropriate term for assholes.

3. The holes in butts.
I was looking for a good boulder for Dinosaur Sex in the woods when some buttholes were blasting Counting Crows on their radio. I pushed my ear-buttons to keep out the wretched garbage-noise.
by Barnaby J. July 10, 2008

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The exact number of any exaggerated quantity of anything (minutes, books, tacos, etc.).
Hey, i saw sally sit in your lap at the party last night. did you finally give in to that swamp donkey?

What?! No, of course not. She weighs like 4 billion pounds!
by Barnaby J. July 10, 2008

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The gelatinous, viscous, amalgamation of diarrhea and usually seminal fluid that drips from the anal orifice down to the catholic schoolgirl knee-socks after a romping good round of buttsex.
Teacher: What is 3+3?

Student 1: I smell poop.

Student 2: Hey Jill, whats that stain on your socks??

Jill: O no i forgot my butt plug. The butt fluid is a-flowin'.

Teacher: Well, go confess.

Jill: Why? It's the priest's fault for ramming it in too hard.
by Barnaby J. July 13, 2008

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The pathetic substitute for real cookies like oreos or chips ahoy. Often bought by overprotective, health-conscious mothers.
-Hey little Johnny, do you want dessert?

-Ya mom! What's there to eat?

-Fig Newtons

-Fig Newtons? Fuck you, mom.
by Barnaby J. July 15, 2008

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Any girl at a party you may not know the identity of.
hey, are you calling jill tonight once you get drunk?

naw, i think i'm just gonna find some strangepuss.
by Barnaby J. July 10, 2008

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First coined by The Monarch in the wildly popular Venture Brothers cartoon, this is a figurative sarcastic list which has events and tasks that are totally lame and simply unwanted.
-Hey little Johnny, can you do me a favor and clean the gutters sometime today?

-Ya, I'll just put it on my to-don't list.

-Oh don't be such a little shit. I'll give you some Fig Newtons afterward!

-Again. Fuck you, mom.
by Barnaby J. July 16, 2008

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1. The skinny cartilaginous wings lining the anterior edge of the external auditory canal. Also called the tragus.

2. The magical buttons that when pushed, hide unwanted garbage-noise from entering the skull.
Do you always stick your fingers in your ear-holes when you hear Counting Crows?

No, I just push my ear-buttons.

What are those?

The little wings outside your ear; you push them onto your ear so you don't get your fingers gross with earwax.

Sounds complicating. I think I'll just stick with wax-fingers.
by Barnaby J. July 10, 2008

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