32 definitions by Anonymous submissions
To get so heavily intoxicated that the participant's position on the space time continuum becomes fluid as he/she 'crosses over.'
Often associated with a complete blurring of the lines between life and death, gay and straight, able bodied and paralysed, and continent and not.
Often associated with a complete blurring of the lines between life and death, gay and straight, able bodied and paralysed, and continent and not.
'Bro, I definitely won the 'drunkest man in Europe' award last night- I was so turbo mega cunt fucked that I crossed-over and woke up in a chicken coop felching a shop mannequin. The only thing that's going to shift this hangover is a masturbaywatch. Now, want to help me fuck this mannequin?'
by Anonymous submissions December 13, 2016
When a heterosexual male (or vaginatarian) is dissatisfied with the overall number of sexual conquests they have achieved to date i.e a down-in-the-dumps no-pumps chump
Bill: ‘Mate, can I talk to you? My discuntent keeps deteriorating so much that I’ve booked in for a penis extension’
Ted: ‘Ha!’
Bill: ‘I’m not joking, I’ve already got the appointment booked’
Ted: ‘It’s not that, I’m just surprised you think your tiny cock is the root cause of your discuntent, when it’s actually the fact that your face looks like it caught on fire and was put out with a bike chain’
Ted: ‘Ha!’
Bill: ‘I’m not joking, I’ve already got the appointment booked’
Ted: ‘It’s not that, I’m just surprised you think your tiny cock is the root cause of your discuntent, when it’s actually the fact that your face looks like it caught on fire and was put out with a bike chain’
by Anonymous submissions June 2, 2021
The metabolic ability of a female (or raging tail gunner) to process nature's yoghurt i.e. a teaspoon of sperm cider
Beatrice: 'Jessica, darling you look absolutely divine- you must tell me your diet secret'
Jessica: 'Well Beatrice, I guess I was just thankfully born with a stupendous metabojism as I manage to stay wafer-thin despite smoking more Poles than Hitler did in all of Word War II'
Jessica: 'Well Beatrice, I guess I was just thankfully born with a stupendous metabojism as I manage to stay wafer-thin despite smoking more Poles than Hitler did in all of Word War II'
by Anonymous submissions July 23, 2018
A type of light entertainment that can be incorporated onto the Christmas table to add a bit of 'bang' to the traditional festive banquet. A smuttier and more entertaining alternative to the routine Christmas cracker, yet more prone to leave the operator with a bevy of sexually transmitted infections.
'Who wants to do this Christmas crackwhore with me? I'd go halvesies with Grandpa again, only last time we shared a Christmas crackwhore the bang gave him a stroke, and now his entire left side is more flaccid than Stephen Hawking's penis
by Anonymous submissions December 6, 2016
'Geez, I really managed to spazzle my boss at the work Christmas party last night- I got so shitfaced that I tried to covertly relieve myself in a coke bottle under the dinner table. In hindsight it was pretty ambitious to think that the poo would have been able to get through the coke bottle neck..'
by Anonymous submissions December 19, 2017
The original title for the Frank Sinatra classic; 'Luck, be a lady tonight.' The title was changed after producers found that focus groups struggled to relate to lyrics about a woman comprised almost entirely of cuntflaps.
Frank (singing in studio): 'Labia lady tonight, your beef curtains gave me a fright'
Producer: 'Ahhh, Frank, those lyrics really aren't doing it for me- I think fans will struggle to relate to a woman with engorged labia'
Frank: (farts disapprovingly)
Producer: 'Ahhh, Frank, those lyrics really aren't doing it for me- I think fans will struggle to relate to a woman with engorged labia'
Frank: (farts disapprovingly)
by Anonymous submissions December 31, 2016
When a woman decides to abstain from sausage and become a vaginatarian, or when a homosexual male sees the light at the end of the tunnel (pun intended) and reverts to penetrating front bums.
'So I went muff diving on my friend Karen yesterday after the Madonna concert and I have to say, it was delightful; I'm cuntverted. Now the bullies can't call me 'Johnny Johnny fat gay twat' anymore, for as of today I am 'Johnny Johnny fat heterosexual twat with fabulous dress sense''
by Anonymous submissions March 9, 2017