4 definitions by Anna Mae Bollocks

A small town in central Texas with an economy based on crappy service jobs and bogus fines. It's only redeeming feature is its proximity to Austin and San Antonio. Doug Sahm, the best musician ever (Sir Douglas Quintet, Texas Tornados) wrote an Epic Awesome Sauce song about Seguin in the 60's but the local yahoos ignored it because it has weed in it, so now Seguin's only claim to fame is the big cement nut downtown. They call it "The World's Largest Pecan" and a number of residents believe it's real.
Hey, have you heard the new (insert band name here) album?" "Naw, man, I live in Seguin, I have to wait for it to come in the mail.
by Anna Mae Bollocks July 17, 2011
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A little community of hopeless squalor mythologized Norman Rockwell-style as "friendly!" (translation: nosey) and "a great place to raise kids!" (translation: drive by shootings are written up as accidental discharges of a firearm in the local paper). Pits of desperate poverty, despair, racism, dysfunction, ignorance, sleaze and drunken failure.
I saw a "re-nig' sticker on truck at the Oak Bar in Seguin...typical small town.

I'm from a small town - I knew girls in high school who were "pregnant" for three years.

Many small town people possess a flattened DNA helix.
by Anna Mae Bollocks October 29, 2012
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An excruciatingly boring town on I-10 between Houston and San Antonio where people have nothing to do but self-medicate so much that many develop cirrhosis by the age of 27.
First person: "I need a ride home, I have to work tomorrow."
Second person: "Fuck that, we still have three cases of beer and a liter of vodka."
Third person; "Columbus, Texas always prevails!"
by Anna Mae Bollocks July 17, 2011
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A location in the small town of Seguin, Texas. The legend is that it was once a party spot for high ranking city officials and their wives, where they went to have drug-fueled orgies. Whether this actually happened is not a proven fact, but many Seguin city councilmen's kids look like other city councilmen.
I'll meet you at the Taco Bell by the Devil Pit - you know, where they used to have the slurp parties.
by Anna Mae Bollocks October 29, 2012
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