Thesaurus for masterbate

Synonyms, antonyms, and related words for masterbate

A common mispelling of "masturbation" used by retarded twelve year olds who are neglected by their parents and listen to Linkin' Park.
"Masterbating" is for pre-pubescent morons who don't know what "masturbation" is.
by The Observer May 06, 2003
Expertly jacking off.
Guy 1:Man, I think steve's masturbating again.
Guy 2: From the sound of it, he ain't just masturbating, he's MASTERbating.
by Sir Fizwheel Humperdink September 22, 2007
What kind of moron are you that you look up sex in the urban dictionary?
Looking up sex??? Seriously, get off now before I turn off the internet.
by TJ (CC) December 03, 2005
predominantely British term for masturbation

Buffing the Banana
Holding Your Sausage Hostage
Jackin' the Beanstalk
Rounding up the Tadpoles
Slap Boxing the One-Eyed Champ
Spank the Frank
Applying the hand brake
Attacking the one-eyed purple-headed warrior
Auditioning the finger puppets
Beef-stroke-it-off
Boxing the bald champ
Charming the snake
Checking for testicular cancer
Choking Kojak
Squeezing the cream from the flesh Twinkie
Straddle your paddle
Taking matters into your own hands
Teasing the weasel
Thumping the pump
Tickling the pickle
etc etc
by Master Bates March 23, 2003
1. n. Semen
2. v. To orgasm

Usage Note: the word is spelled with a 'u' to differentiate it from 'come,' which has a... cleaner definition.
I just got some spam inviting me to "cum here." Is there a double meaning here???
by The Grammar Nazi November 19, 2001
The tool used to wean and convert lesbians and virgins into useful, productive members of society.
The lesbian babe saw the light and became straight when a real penis penetrated her vaginal lips.
by urban pervert April 08, 2003
1. To masturbate by rubbing the penis, jack off.

2. To waste time in an annoying way. Goof off, jerk around, fart around.

3. A person who is distracted and wasting time. Also spelled: jerk-off

4. An insult: something you'd call a person, implying vaguely that the person is clueless or inferior.
"Joe jerks off two or three times a day."
"Last night, his girlfriend jerked him off in the car."

"Is our son jerking off again, when he ought to be doing his homework?" (Yeah, the old man meant "goofing off," but he said "jerking off." Heh heh.)

"Hey, jerk-off, quit watching the game and roll some dice."

"That jerk-off? He's a total douchebag."
by vanilla g-lotto December 21, 2004
stimulating your penis with your hand to cause orgasm and ejaculation. Male masturbation.
Brian had the blue balls so bad he had to jack off as soon as he got home.
by Marty October 19, 2003
masturbating
i like to jack off
by baby November 05, 2003
All the slang words for masturbation: bashing the candle, Bleeding the weasel, bleedin the weed, buffing the banana, bopping the baloney, burping the worm, choking the chicken, cleaning your rifle, corking the bat, cranking the shank, cuffing the carrot, fisting your mister, flogging your dog, floggin the frog, flogging the hog, flogging the log, flute solo, jerkin'the gherkin, looping the mule, manual override, painting the pickle, pocket pinball, pocket pool, polishing the banister, polishing the rocket, pounding your flounder, pumping the python, roping the pony, spanking the monkey, teasing the weasel, tossing the turkey, walking the dog, whipping the willy, wonking your cronker, yanking the crank.
Vote for the clit commander. and may the clit live on
by The clit commander April 10, 2003

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