Somebody from the country north of the United States, which has:
Maple Syrup; Hockey; Universal Healthcare; Peace; Low Crime/Violence Rates; Excellent Donuts and Coffee (AKA Tim Horton's); Better, Cheaper Beer; Lovely Women; Nicer People;
Better Winter Sports; Cultural/Tolerance; Good/Cheap Education; Superior Genetalia.
Person 1: So I got smashed on good brew this weekend and had some great sex.
Person 2: Oh yeah, eh? Me too!
Person 3: (Jealously) Damn canadians.
A dumb bitch who uses the wrong hand to make the "L" symbol on her forehead.
As seen in the image above.
Use your right hand, fucktard
, so it looks like an "L" to the rest of the world. Using your left makes it an "L" only to you.
Here are some reasons to be proud to be Canadian:
2. Crispy Crunch, Coffee Crisp
3. The size of our footballs fields and one less down
4. Baseball is Canadian
5. Lacrosse is Canadian
6. Hockey is Canadian
7. Basketball is Canadian
8. Apple pie is Canadian
9. Mr. Dress-up kicks Mr. Rogers ass
10. Tim Hortons kicks Dunkin' Donuts ass
11. In the war of 1812, started by America, Canadians pushed
the Americans back...past their 'White House'. Then we burned it...and most of Washington, under the command of William Lyon McKenzie who was insane and hammered all the time. We got bored because they ran away, so we came home and partied...Go figure..
12. Canada has the largest French population that never surrendered to
13. We have the largest English population that never ever surrendered or withdrew during any war to anyone, anywhere.
14. Our civil war was a bar fight that lasted a little over an hour.
15. The only person who was arrested in our civil war was an American
mercenary, who slept in and missed the whole thing... but showed up just in time to get caught.
16. We knew plaid was cool far before Seattle caught on.
17. The Hudsons Bay Company once owned over 10% of the earth's surface and is still around as the worlds oldest company.
18. The average dog sled team can kill and devour a full grown human in under 3 minutes.
19. We still know what to do with all the parts of a buffalo.
20. We don't marry our kin-folk.
21. We invented ski-doos, jet-skis, velcro, zippers, insulin, penicillin, zambonis, the telephone and short wave radios that save countless lives each year.
22. We ALL have frozen our tongues to something metal and lived to tell about it.
23. A Canadian invented Superman.
BUT MOST IMPORTANT!
24. The handles on our beer cases are big enough to fit your hands with mitts on. OOOoohhhhh Canada!!
Oh yeah... and our elections only take one day.
Hey, stick that in your pipe and toke it.
The best and most entertaining sport out there. PERIOD.
Sadly, hockey's greatness isn't appreciated everywhere. But in Canada, we live and breathe this game, this one sport is intrinsically what links a nation together, it's a part of our heritage.
We even celebrate "Hockey Day in Canada." The passion and love for this game extends to young and old alike, children in pee wee games across the country dream about living the ultimate fantasy and playing in the NHL.
Nothing brings together a city more than a winning local team, nothing brings together a country more than winning on an international level(again, and again and again, I might add).
I get goosebumps when the crowd sings along with O' Canada, I feel giddy when I hear the HNIC theme song, I leave work early or skip class when my schedule interferes with a hockey game, I wear my hockey jersies proudly after a big win, I have crazy game day rituals and I jump up when we score. I'm blissfully happy when my team wins and torn after a loss.
DON'T TELL ME IT'S JUST A GAME.
There is something seriously wrong with you if you don't passionately love hockey.
1. To spray down with machine gun fire.
2. To completely ruin something.
The CO jumped out of the bushes but he got hosed by the VC.
That damn virus hosed my disk drive.
A term for Canadians like "Yankee" to Americans. Comes from a WWI comic book called "Johnny Canuck" a Canadian soldier in the war. Also the name of Vancouver's NHL team
September 22, 2003
1. The status of being bent
for more than a day. Usually results in loss of memory, money, strange tattoos, and other things you'll have a hell of a time explaining.
2. A homosexual male (British slang). Someone who is bent, that is, not straight
3. The alcoholic
, chain-smoking, kleptomaniac
robot on Futurama
1. What? Monday off?! I'll be on a three-day bender.
2. In the '70s, no one knew Elton
was a bender.
3. "Bite my shiny metal ass!"
anyone who defines their own name on urban dictionary
what the shit? that kid is a fucking idiot.
The kind of guy most girls ACTUALLY want when they say they want a Nice Guy
Jerks are selfish, manipulative bastards who see women as little more then sexual conquests to brag about to their buddies or mere objects that are there for their personal pleasure. As to ensure the post-sex breakup will be in their favor, Jerks often play the "sensative guy" early on so the girl will make most of the moves on HIM, and after he's done with her and dumps her for some other girl just like her, he can make it look like she's at fault for coming on too strong, and consequently she'll take him back if he chooses to return for seconds.
Typically are/were Frat Boy
s, and Prep
s in school.
"Yeah, Billy's a real Jerk the way he used Tricia like that. Can't believe she bought his crap though."
1.utterly and undoubtedly affixiated in a troublesome situation
2. reflecting on a situation in a negative manner
syn: Jacked, screwed, fucked
"we got hosed tommy, we got hosed"
February 14, 2003