Where what some consider the happiest people in America (the Amish) almost never show it, where the "gay Dutch" hate gays, where you can't find anything to eat between Philadelphia airport and Lancaster, where it takes a year to get a farmer at a market you see two or three times a week to make conversation with you, and where you get fat, get gray, and die. I gained 30 pounds in three years. Probably the snack capital of the country, with no park districts I've seen to walk those calories off (that would require foresight, education, and civic planning). None of the middle age folk I got to know gave me any sense they liked me 'til I was moving.
Go ahead, fall in love with it in December, 'cause most of PA was made for Christmas (farmhouse kitsch, anyone?), but for culture's sake, don't move there. The reverse of Narnia, it's always Christmas in Pennsyltucky, but never charmed. Even an instutution as powerful, monied, dispursed, and excellent as Penn State can't address the ignorance of the populace. Trust me. If you don't have an AARP card, don't move there.
Philadelphia hip-hoppers The Roots celebrate their city's heritage, but they get to leave Pennsylvania on tour. Home of Constitution Hall, the Pennsylvania of today hasn't seen a civil liberty it didn't try to eradicate at the polls.
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