1. (noun): The controlled affectations or coherent observations of the physical universe through processes lacking any operating principles.
2. (noun): A practical application of operating principles so arcane despite not breaking any physical laws, that in a universe of infinite size and duration, one could be assured that they had never been discovered and used before, nor if lost, would ever be again.
3. (adjective): An attribute which indicates that something is fundamentally unexplainable; any attempt to explain it leads to logical contradictions.
4. (adjective): The hallucinogenic attributes of certain mushrooms.
5. (noun): A game played by predominantly sexually repressed male persons ranging from high school aged boys who have never been on a date, to middle aged men who tell themselves they are holding out for the right person, preferably a real live anime furry.
1a. Oh my god, it's magic! Run for your life!
1b. Wouldn't it be nice if they taught magic side by side with physics in public schools and let the students decide?
2. George Foreman's grill is magic. And it knocks out the fat.
3a. Darling, this evening is simply magical. So I guess I probably shouldn't have eaten those mushrooms.
3b. Q: In a town where every man must be shaved by the barber if and only if he doesn't shave himself, how does the barber get shaved? A: Magic.
4. Darling, this evening is totally freaky because I'm so wasted. I'm glad I ate those magic mushrooms.
5. Look at those nerds over there playing magic. Now point and laugh.
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