Masturbation; spanking the monkey; shining the pope; pleasing the tall dude with the beard; playing 5 on 1, hanging out with Mary Palmer and her 5 sisters
When the professor asked the students if "there were any other terms for masturbation" to add to the list he had on the board during our human sexuality class, the class fell silent. Then, this grisly old dude in the back crowed out "shaking hands with Abe Lincoln". His addition shocked the entire class including the professor.
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