A an old fashioned, homeschooling mother who thinks that girls should suffer during warm weather because shorts and tank tops will turn them into strippers destined for hell.
*girl walks into room wearing a weather-appropriate but not revealing tank top and jeans*
Puritan mother: Oh my goodness! Put some clothes on before you end up spending the rest of your life in a brothel!
Girl: But look at Zack! He's shirtless and his jeans are so low we can practically see all of his boxers! Why is that ok??
Puritan mother: Because I'm a sexist bitch.
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