1.) One who considers turning left a sport.
2.) One who consumes Pabst Blue Ribbon while watching aforementioned "sport".
3.) One who has never heard of WRC, or otherwise cannot comprehend the sheer magnitude of WRC's inherent superiority over NASCAR.
4.) One who fails to realize that the automotive world is far bigger than just Ford, GM, and Daimler-Chrysler.
5.) One who takes offense when Dale Earnhardt Jr. is exposed as a media-whoring redneck bastard with no talent.
6.) One who may possibly have been or is currently in a sexual relationship with a blood relative.
7.) One who should be murdered on-sight, preferrably with a blunt object salvaged from a Toyota parts bin.
Shut up, NASCAR Fan, before I say something really mean.
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