A team (preferably a duo) hired by a police commissioner (preferably not seen) to take on cases and jobs (preferably none anyone in their right mind would do) for a meager wage (preferably in Hostess snack food and non-bootleg corndogs).
Only wisecracking overzealous crime stoppers fill this job. They are found loitering near convenience stores, have wanton disregard to the rules of the road, and take random things as "evidence". Cases handed to them always get done, but probably not in a way people expect them to be solved.
Person 1: Did you know Freelance Police curse in long hand?
Person 2: Well, semicolon apostrophe hyphen comma good for them!
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