Edward Cullen (pronounced 'pedophile') is a sparkly, 117-year-old virgin sparklepire from the atrocious book/movie saga, Twilight.
He is the girlfri- I mean, boyfriend of the bland teenage Mary Sue, Bella Swan and the long-time rival of borderline-rapist, Jacob Black (see 'fake-ass werewolf').
His pastimes are sparkling, jumping around the woods and watching 17 year old girls sleep.
person #1: "I swear someone is in bedroom watching us... "
person #2: "Yeah, it's that pedophile, Edward Cullen."
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