1. A martial arts master.
2. The star of countless movies that are amazingly awesome.
3. Star of the show "Walker Texas Ranger" where he plays a Texas Ranger named Walker. This show has been cancelled because too many eight year olds wet their beds at the sight of Chuck Norris kicking ass.
4. A man who always personally greets you to his website.
5. See God.
One day I saw Chuck Norris, I am now in the witness protection program.
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