Burnley....otherwise known as 'Burn-er-lee' or 'Burnlah'....if you have the misfortune of hailing from the crummy little town in the West Yorkshire hills.
i"a small insignificant town in Yorkshire"/i
The six-toed inbreds that live in this ram-shackle squat, once known as a milltown are known to everybody else as dingles....this is NOT a term of endearment. The people of Burnley are a good example of what happens when a small community breeds over & over within itself...the gene pool shrinks to a gene puddle & voila! you have dingles!
The sorry folk of the village known as Burnley have an incredible inferiority complex....this complex being known as the sprawling metropolis that is Blackburn.
The very mention of the word Blackburn sends the dinglefolk into a tremendous jealous rage. Dingle parents are often heard telling their offspring/partners (often the same thing) bedtime stories of magic & witchcraft. Crazy tales of things called "Lek-tri-city" & "t`horseless carriages" & "successful football team".....all things too strange to imagine.
It is also said that 'community elders' can actually remember far far back to 'th`olden days'....a time when their team Burnley fc last beat their most hated rivals...the mighty Blackburn Rovers.
For over 28 years the tiny little inferior club has festered away in the huge black shadow that is Blackburn Rovers. Generations of six-toed children have grown up not knowing what a 'derby-day victory' is.
Burnley-folk also seem to have an unfortune trait. It is a tendancy to exaggerate greatly with numbers & statistics. This 'trait' often comes to the fore when they talk about "football attendancies on`t turf" & "away followings". Doctors have confirmed it is a mass form of "exaggerative numerical dyslexia".....meaning they tend to add a 'few thousand' onto their actual numbers/gates, so as not to look like the small club they really are. Another form of this dyslexia takes form as a difficulty to distinguish between "large & small". Ask any hill-trollto describe their football club & they will say hillarious things like "big club" & "sleeping giant"....when they really mean to say "small & unimportant" & "failing club".
If ever you have the misfortune of communicating with a dingle & you manage to actually understand their thick yorkshire tones, it would be advisable to to seek words of wisdom from a Blackburnian who will gladly 'put you right' on any of the more absurd claims they make.
Blackburnians, unlike Burnley-folk have good memories & can remember crowds of 2-3000 on`t turf & will also tell you many great tales of derby-day victories, winning of trophies & cups & european trips.
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