zlotoff

The process of improperly applying cream cheese to a bagel. When zlotoffing, instead of applying cream cheese to the entire bagel initially, and then consuming, one adds the cream cheese one bite at a time. As any biz-school student can tell you, this process is vastly more inefficient than the normal way of applying cream cheese. Due to this inefficiency, the intelligence of zlotoffers everywhere is called into serious question.

I don't have time to zlotoff my bagel! I have to get to class! And besides, what kind of idiot would zlotoff a bagel anyways? Everyone knows there are no benefits! And not only is zlotoffing bagels slower, there is also an extreme social stigma attached to it, so if I were to zlotoff my bagel, I would run the risk of being ostracized by my peers.

zlotoff by Andy Hall July 27, 2006

zloof 

to have a squeegee shoved up one's ass, usually without consent.

i was showering with my friend yesterday, and then he zloofed me. what a dick!

zloof by orange45 December 21, 2008

Zloof 

VERB:
1] to masturbate with the specific intention of being caught.

INTERJECTION:
2] the word that is screamed by said masturbator when he/she is inevitably caught.

1] verb: "I am totally going to zloof my roommate later," "Watch out, man, you're gonna get zloofed."

2] interjection: Brian walked in to the house to find his roommate, Steven, furiously masturbating. "ZLOOF!" Steven exclaimed with a grin.

Zloof by Little Schnee September 22, 2008