So you want to be a Yuppie? Here's what you have to do.
Never act masculine. Masculine is macho, you know, and all the soccer moms just HATE anything masculine.
Never learn how to drive a stick shift like a man. Drive a wussy automatic, just like an old grandma. Or a chimpanzee. Step on your brakes all the time, just like an old lady. Ride your brakes going down all hills. Never learn how to gear down your transmission or take it out of overdrive.
Cultivate arrogance. Wear it on your face as a smug expression. Always talk down to waiters and service people, to let them know you're a hot-shit Yuppie. To prove your worth, always blow a trumpet fanfare when you lock your car. Be the first Yuppie on the block to buy a set of trumpets that blow when you lock your house. Everyone wants to hear trumpets, and they will all look up to you in awe and admiration.
Always jabber and prattle on your cell phone like an old lady gossiping. Everyone who sees you will admire you.
Learn to call problems "issues," just like a soccer mom. All the soccer moms will admire you for that.
Tell everyone you're going on vacation in Cancun or St. Tropez. That will surely score you big points with the soccer moms.
Always carry a PDA. The more useless things it does, the better. Show everyone how it can dial a phone and remind you it's time to go for your manicure. For extra points, let it remind you to go for a pedicure.
When a crowd is listening, pick up your cell phone and talk LOUDLY. Say "buy 40,000 shares of IBM."
Wherever you go, assume an air of entitlement. You are entitled to take your dog inside stores, despite the NO DOGS signs. You are entitled to use your cell phone in the movies. You are entitled to two parking spaces.
Trent is an insipid, smirking Yuppie. He is entitled to park his Lexus in the handicap parking place because he'll only be in the store for 20 minutes.
by Delicious Tuna Wanda September 29, 2007
yuppies are trendy young upper class college educated people. yuppies have jogging strollers or baby Bjorn baby carriers (ladies), greenhouses,trek with trek poles (yuppie poles),college sweat suits,plasma TVs,kindle,chi irons,Keurig coffee machines,go to movie screenings and cupcake bakeries, shop at upscale stationary stores, wineries, rare bookstores, upscale stores Williams Sonoma,upscale museum shops Metroploitan Museum of Art moma.org, trendy bookstore Kramerbooks,Apple stores, tea shops,go to farmer's markets with expensive (often oversized) strollers, health foods stores, Costco, international upscale grocery stores : Phoenicia Houston,TX, World Harvest Illinois,upscale grocers: Balducci's,Wegmans,Harris Tweeter,Straub's
yuppies are into tennis,wine clubs, risotto,(ladies) wearing heated neck wraps at spas and detox body wraps, Pilates,yoga,Martinis,chai,and go to kinesiologists and patisseries.
by diane70 February 28, 2012
A term used to refer to a Young Urban Professional.

Yuppies generally meet all or most of the following criteria:

1. Generally white males in their 20's and 30's but women and other races are possible.

2. Have college degree(s) or IT certifications.

3. Live within city limits of a major city or at least a town with a very high standard of living. Yuppies either rent expensive town-homes or condominiums or own a house that costs at least 2 times the median selling price of homes in the area.

4. Yuppies are rarely found in the country as Yuppies have a fear of dirt and insects or doing anything that requires manual labor.

5. Insist on driving expensive new cars. Favorites are BMW, Mercedes, Lexus, Infinity, Range Rover and Acura. Many Yuppies refuse to keep a car more than 2 or 3 years before trading it in for a new model of the same car or something more expensive.

6. Yuppies wear expensive designer clothes

7. Yuppies regard personal appearance above all

8. Yuppies prefer not to get married but most maintain a live in girlfriend/boyfriend/fling.

9. Although Yuppies like to flaunt wealth they are also cheap skates and will not offer to buy friends drinks at bars or pick up the tab at the restaurant.

10. Yuppies usually make a salary that is far higher than the work they do is actually worth.

11. Above all, Yuppies are generally rude to other people and look down on anyone who appears to be "below" them.
That Yuppie just drove up in his BMW, got out his lint comb for his designer shirt before going into the 5 star restaurant with his prissy girlfriend...
by JL01 January 14, 2011
Anyone who walks out of a shop with a 15 dollar sandwich and calmly watches the officer take the 500 dollar boot off his vehicle for parking in the wrong place on purpose.
Anyone who thinks that walking their dog at a block party and saying hello to someone else walking their dog is going to get them laid.
Anyone who's so ignorant of traffic that they tell someone "you can't come in here" when they're having one of their stupid little block parties.
In my opinion, yuppie neighborhoods are no better than the ghetto.
by KrazyKurves July 10, 2008
A term which might have a lot of negative connotations attached to it, but really only means what it stands for - Young Urban Professional. In other words, it's anyone who is over twenty and under forty, lives in an urban environment and has a good career. This does most likely mean that they are fairly affluent, but it doesn't necessarily mean that they're self-centered, obsessed with showing off, pissy if they don't start off every single day of their lives with a latte from Starbucks, or anything else like that.
I plan to become a yuppie once I'm out of grad school, but that one little label doesn't make me a bad person.
by future urban professional December 04, 2005
derived from young urban professional +ie ,created in the early 80's
by hazzi January 17, 2003
yuppie are trendy upper class young people. they go to boutique hotels, Dylan's Candy bar, the cheesecake factory, and they wear Wolford tights, Cosabella (ladies), La Perla (ladies), (the kids of yuppies) have Razor scooters, towels and sheets with high thread per inch,rare flowers, and shop at bergdorf goodman,nordstrom,henri bendel,barneys,they drink luxury vodkas, smoke natural (without additives) cigarettes : Nat Sherman or American Spirit or luxury cigarettes :Dunhills or Gauloises (ladies),they go fox hunting.
yuppies drink coffees at Urth Caffe, Starbucks, Peet's coffee, Coffee Bean and Tea, Jack's Stir Brew Coffee.
by 70diane70 February 29, 2012
Members of an overpriced household in an overpriced area with overpriced posessions, none of which are prepared to clean their own toilet, or put out the trash.
Yuppie 1: "The skivvy is refusing to clean the en-suite"
Yuppie 2: "Just get the gardener to use the shovel when hes finished pruning the cumbrellas what ever they are, and make sure he puts out the trash before he goes".
by Pictii October 01, 2014
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