1) Big book which has many uses
2) your history coursework after you've "accidently" pissed on it.
1) Uses of the yellow pages;
Making short/dumpy girls easier to kiss
Destroying your enemies
Fuel for your fire, when you run out of babies
and many, many more
Jack: "OH! SHIT! I just pissed on my History coursework! just look at these yellow pages!"
The most accurate and most logical religious text I personally have ever read in my life. I mean who could not believe after reading the story of Jesus and Mohammed fighting aliens on 1-922-9344 on St. John's BBQ joint. It even preaches the negative consequences on adultery at 1-900-TITS-N-ASS. It is generally read by crack addicts. Because only people under such a mind stimulating substance could appreciate the truth. The satanic equivalent to this book would be Microsoft Bing.
The Yellow Pages changed my life as a person. It taught me how to love and how to live.
When a woman has a vagina that is so saggy that it resembles worn out yellow pages from a public telephone booth.
She was hot, but when I went down on her, I thought I was in a phone booth, lookin at the yellow pages.