1. A condition suffered by persons from Bedford when they leave their native swamplands. A fear of dryness, or aridity
2. The fear of being caught by one's boss whilst photocopying one's genitalia (that's 'tentacles' if you come from Bedford)
"I was really worried the other day, I was changing the paper tray on the photocopier, when my boss walked in and caught me bent over the machine. It must have looked very odd from where he was standing"
"yes that's a clear case of xerophobia you've got there...Lucky for you that your boss doesn't come from Bedford!"