A Wreath \ˈrēth\ is a large grass bagel that is hung without purpose or reason on the front of your shitty door in an attempt to mask your sad and pathetic marriage. It was created, in most circumstances, by an unwarranted child brought into the world by promiscuous rebellion sex inspired by your fiery hatred toward your strict and religious parents. Thus you live the rest of your existence and secret contempt, fighting the urge to murder your loved ones and become a stripper by hanging useless trinkets on the front of your door with a smile.
Kari: "Oh Susan that's a beautiful ring of of weeds and sticks! and what gave you the idea to nail such a delightful a clump of shit to your door?"
Susan: "Well thank you Kari! It's actually a wreath I saw in a target catalog! oh and the need to distract my self from my inevitable suicide."