The woman a man is betrothed to. In some cases, notably among the poorly-educated in the American Deep South and the royalty in Europe, she very well be the sister or cousin of the man as well.
Redneck: I just married my cousin!
Prince John: What a coincidence, I just married my sister.
Normal people: Freaks.
Someone who must absolutely never find out about your girlfriend
John: I'm with you because I love you, I'm married to my wife because she has money.
so what do you wanna do tomorrow?
- i dunno. (long awkward silence)wife...
The number one stalker in your life. Your consciousness, the number one voice in your head. Whatever has marked you as its prey.
I was trying to get away from this guy that was following me around, then I thought, "time to throw on the good ol wife beater."
WASH. IRON. FUCK. Etc.
God DAMN IT WOMAN DID I STUDDER, Get me a Beer. I love you honney. now go slip into that cute lil number so I can bust a nut and have you make me babys
something that Australia men obtain when they become too lazy to masturbate, and then regret it for the rest of their lives.
Bruce: I'm getting tired of stropping the knob five times a day, it's time I got a wife to do it for me.
: when one of your friends gets married to a chick that is pure evil. The most common result of which is never seeing your friend again because his new wife has sucked the marrow of life out of your friendship. Used in anger, general despair, or for humorous effect when all you can do is laugh about the whole situation because it's so retarded.
1. Dude, he totally got wifed!
2. She's got him so wifed, he doesn't know his moose-knuckle from a pimply walnut.
or when marriage becomes a quickly-approaching cloud of doom...
3. She's wifing him, man. It's only a matter of time :(