| 974. | Mancini | ||
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A set of summer shorts with a pattern not unlike a picnic blanket. Individual preferences include, but are not limited to: Plaid or Alternating of contrasting colored solid squares. Spotting someone wearing "Mancinis" is a clear indicator that summer has arrived. They are commonly seen at lakefronts, on camping trips or visiting newly born babies. One who chooses to wear "Mancinis" will often experience feelings of joy, drunkenness, and the warmth associated with being around good friends. Also commonly known as "Picnic Pants", The term "Mancini" is reserved for those of a higher social standing and ultimately more self respect. Scenerio 1
Boy: "Why wont you go out with me?" Girl: "You have no style and don't know how to party" Boy: "I'm heading over to Bob's Stores to pick up a pair of Mancinis" Girl: "Really? Lets make love!!" Scenerio 2 Prince William: "What should I wear on our honeymoon?" Catherine Middleton: "Mancinis of course" Fact: "Every time a bell rings"...Chuck Norris kills someone with a roundhouse kick to the face and then wipes his victims blood on his new "Mancinis" |
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| 975. | Asshole Origami | ||
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The art of folding the last piece of toilet paper to in order to maximize the amount of clean wipes after taking a shit. Hey Scott, replace the toilet paper next time! I had to play asshole origami in there!
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| 976. | Patty Melt | ||
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When after having anal sex, the male wipes the residue off his penis between his partner's cheeks. The sex was so dirty last night, I ended up making a patty melt.
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| 977. | Fuckrudders | ||
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The anthropologically correct pronunciation of a popular hamburger restaurant chain found all over the United States. Cashier: Hello sir, what can I get for you? more...
Michael: Hmm... I'm not sure, what's your most popular burger here at Fuckrudders? Cashier: Ermm.. it's actually pronounced Fuddr- Michael: -shut the fuck up bitch, I'm an anthropology major, I think I'd know my shit on this kind of thing better than you would. Just LAWL at you actually trying to correct ME of all people on this. I swear to God if you even THINK about 'correcting' me again I will blow your fucking brains out. ::pulls .45 caliber Springfield XD handgun out of waistband and points it at her forehead:: Cashier: ::shrieks in horror:: OH MY GOD. UMMMmmm.. ummm.. our 'Southwest Burger' is pretty popular I guess. Would you like one of those? ::sweats nervously:: Michael: NO. I'm vegan. Sigh. I fucking hate this place. Meat is murder. etc Cashier: LOL, phewwww ::relaxes and wipes sweat off forehead:: and here I was thinking I might actually get shot to death hahaha. Whew, good thing it turns out you're just some vegan hipster. Weeeee. Looks like I have nothing to worry about here after all. weeeeee! Michael: BUT! BUT ummm this is like a real gun and stuff, you should do as I say!! Stop ignoring me! Just cuz I'm vegan doesn't mean I'm a pussy! C'mon! Obey me woman!!! Cashier: LOLLLLL lololol... ::ignores Michael/remains completely unconcerned, now that she knows he's just some weak ass vegan:: Michael: ::sulks and drives off in his Prius:: |
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| 978. | Taking A Bill | ||
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1. The elimination of horrible fecal waste through one's anus, more extreme than the average process. 2. Taking an unbelievable shit to the point it's not a shit, it's taking a Bill. 3. A sweat-filled, terribly smelly, wet dump; one in which you must remove your shirt, can only be called taking a Bill. 4. A very time-consuming poop, usually requiring countless wipes and many flushes. Frank: "Hey, what took you so long? I waited nearly 30 minutes."
Tom: "Screw you man, I was taking a Bill. It was horrible. The wiping would never end." Frank: "Oh man, I'm so sorry. My bad bro." |
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| 979. | pootwat | ||
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A female that wipes from back to front, spreading the funk, so to speak. You just know Rebecca Black is a pootwat.
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| 980. | clean enough | ||
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The feeling of sheer frustration and surrender following an extremely long wiping session on the toilet. Typically occurs when a small brown stain continues to appear on said paper over a threshold of roughly twenty consecutive wipes. Ah, fuck it! It's clean enough. *Pulls pants up*
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