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15.
A beautiful intelligent female with whom husbands enter into a marriage contract. As the years pass the husband will often notice that the wife looks more and more like 'momma' everyday.
"Momma makes good biscuits and you do too darlin'" the husband said to his wife.
by Rxer November 12, 2010
 
16.
The reason why:

-You walk around with a collar and leash. See slave

-Half your shit is gone after the divorce. See owned

-Why you stop having sex after the honeymoon.

-Why you get judged for glancing the wrong direction which happens to have a different girl in it than it.
"Stop staring at that other girl! I'm your wife."

"You don't need to get the prenupt. I'll be your wife forever" (O RLY?!?!)

"My wife said she just wasn't in that mood...again..."

"WHY THE FUCK DID YOU STARE AT THAT GIRL AGAIN?!?! IS SHE PRETTIER THAN ME?!?! AM I FAT?!?! WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME?!?! AM I NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU?!?! DO YOU HATE ME?!?! MAYBE WE SHOULD GET A DIVORCE!!!!" (I told you)

by Sgt. Sexual Harassment Panda November 18, 2007
 
17.
1. The absolute worst thing that can ever happen to a man.
2. A ruthless lie masking a hideous truth.
3. When you are totally and completely fucked out of everything and have to start all over again no matter how loyal, hardworking attentive, or just plain fucking awesome you were while being stabbed in the back.

4. Something no one understands until they have one and then it is too late, all is lost.

5. Another word for "life toilet".
1. Don't do it, omfg no, please, really don't!
2. No really, she gives you blow jobs now but when she is your wife you'll never get a blow job again unless you cheat on her.
3. Dude you got WIFED, just blow your fucking brains out if you have the balls, or be like the rest of us and just pretend to be happy while our hearts, souls, minds and finances are being endlessly and brutally raped.
4. Seriously, you don't get it, trust me you don't want to get because only people in hell (aka husbands) really know.

5. I gave her all of my money, my time, all of my hard work and commitment, and after she made me her dickless, balless snivling little bitch she legally stole all of my money and left home, now she is paying for her boyfriends crack addiction with the child support payments which make up more than half of my paycheck while my kids go without decent clothes.
by TomSax November 11, 2013
 
18.
A Creature you will think you understand, You will test fuck her, marry and have kids only to find out years later that this one does not like sex anymore. You will give her everything, anything and she still wont perform like she did when you were test driving her.
I love my wife, we have been married a long time. She cleans the house, does the laundry and cooks, but she does not fuck anymore. She forgets that before her, I cooked, cleaned and did my own laundry. Fucking was a BIG part of why I chose to marry her.

Sally just got divorced, shes 40, Someone got tired of her crap. She probably was not giving up the pussy properly.

Gina says her husband is not interested in sex. She is hot and good in bed :)
by Master of Kajira July 19, 2013
 
19.
An extreme hardcore version of a girlfriend.
"I have a wife now."

"Whoa man."
by KuroAmaya December 23, 2013
 
20.
v. (vulgar, colloquial) (often speculative, boasting) (bowdlerized slang) have sexual intercourse with. Especially used POS.
"I'm going to wife her". "I would wife her so hard". "I would wife Betty, but the whole time I'd be thinking about Wilma"
by BartelbyJones August 21, 2011
 
21.
A man's personal sandwich artist.
Wife: I'm going to the kitchen.

Me: Cool, bring me a sandwich, bitch.
by Thatotherguyfromthestore February 10, 2010