An excuse for people you barely know or like to invite you to spend a fortune on them and fawn over them for a whole day. Sometimes they will give you expensive wedding lists
and yet get away with feeding you Asti Spumanti
and mild cheese sandwiches.
Once invited to the wedding it is a downhill spiral into debt and having to buy summery dresses in the winter, and an expensive gift that you know that you cannot afford and that they will never use.
"so how come you can't afford that new BMW 3 series?"
" I have been invited to a wedding and have to save up for the gift"
a spiffy ceremony in which two people get married only to divorce/kill eachother a year later.
"when i say shotgun, you say wedding"
The instance of a £15,000/$27,000 event featuring two people taking the fisrt step toward divorce, recieving 12 toasters, dancing to lame Celine Dion songs and eating obscene amounts of cake.
At least one embarrasing drunk is required.
Went to a wedding. Got drunk.
An event which will provoke the release of all known human bodily fluids, though not every person in attendance will release all of the fluids. Among the fluids to be released:
* Tears: The mother of the bride will cry at how nice her daughter looks and how beautiful the event is;
* Nasal discharge: Someone is bound to sneeze during the service;
* Sweat: The groom will be sweating, as he’ll be wondering if he’s making the right choice and ponders how his life may change;
* Saliva: “You may now kiss the bride …”
* Urine: At one point, all guests are going to have to take a leak;
* Vomit/stomach acid: Someone’s bound to have a few too many at the reception and spend much of the time driving the porcelain bus;
* Semen/vaginal fluids: The couple will get their freak on for the first time as husband and wife, if not the first time ever;
* Milk: If the bride gets pregnant, her ta-tas will produce milk when the baby is born;
* Blood: The divorce a few years down the road will result in either physical or figurative bloodshed
Better bring a towel - weddings result in loss of bodily fliuds!
Typically, a $20,000-$50,000 party intended to represent a heterosexual couple's devotion to one another (see marriage
). Such a party usually involves a year or more of planning and lasts only a single day.
You're going to stay married damnit, cause we didn't pay $40,000 on your wedding for nothing. -- A mother to her daughter 5 years after marriage.
The fusing of two metals with a hot torch.
Webster’s Dictionary defines wedding as “the fusing of two metals with a hot torch.” Well you know something? I think you guys are two metals … gold medals.
Yeah yeah get on with it! Where is the food in this place?
Hurry up with this wedding! I wanna go home!
The process of removing one's weeds from one's garden
Websters defines a wedding as "The process of removing one's weeds from one's garden." - Homer Simpson