2. Theo's mum found his wankerchief and got cum all over her hand after he had a good session of porn-watching.
"Sure, it's a little crusty but you can use it"
"Shit, what do I do now?"
"You need to get yourself a wankerchief"
Son: No mum, people would think I'm a chronic masturbator and call it a wankerchief.