| 1. | Farmer Fuck | ||
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A male who cant perform in bed properly or should i say at all. no foreplay no rubbing or touching of any kind. just sticks his cock in there and has a few quick thrusts and "sorry girls" its all over with a grunt. like a farmer herding cattle or ploughing crops, in and out with no effort and the bare minimum of work..seems to be either young males that are too damm stupid to know any better or older males that have complex issues about females. Sad though because most farmer fucks actually think they are really good in bed and act like "players" to their friends. leaves girls very unsatisfied and frustrated and most times straight into the arms of a "Non Farmer Fuck" thus leading to more emotional scars for the poor farmer who will never learn any better.
Unfortunatley you cant determine a farmer untill after you have shagged them. A male version of a "starfish fuck" Girl1 "oh man!! i had the worst shag last night"
Girl2 "whys that?" Girl1 "He didnt do anything, and i mean anything!! and it lasted not even minute" Girl2 "oh no!!you had a farmer fuck" |
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| 2. | Demon Prince of Khorne | ||
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A sexual technique in which the one participant is able to cause his or her partner to climax instantaniously through a single gesture (somtimes referred to as the Cum-Pistol)or spoken word. Practitioners of this are incedibly rare and not usually sought after as recipients often remain unsatisfied after the act because of the lack of foreplay. A true master, however, will weave this aspect of pleasure along with a myriad of others during intercourse allowing their partner to experiance a euphoria of sensations. Although no official record can confirm it, there are many rumors that this technique can indeed be fatal as endorphins overwhelm the red blood cells and the victim silently suffocates, a smile on their lips. She was struck hard and fast by the Demon Prince of Khorne.
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| 3. | Donny Osmond Special | ||
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When you and your lady are getting ready to do the dirty, you tell her to wait for just a minute while you step out of the room. When you return, you are wearing a lobster suit. Instead of intercourse, you simply run around the room wailing, "Whalla-walla-wallah!". Your current girlfriend should be left dazed, confused, and unsatisfied. Shortly after this stunt, jump out of the window and drive away. Warning: You will probably be seeking a new girlfriend afterwards. "I usually don't do this, but tonight I think I am going to pull a "Donny Osmond Special" on insert current girlfriend's name here"
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