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1. Two's On That
An Ely, UK, based coloquialism. This phrase is used when one wishes to express sarcastic appreciation for an object, person or event. Pioneers of this phrase can adapt to any circumstance, despite how inappropriate and seemingly moronic. Origin of this phrase from going twosies on a cigarette. The exact adaptation is hazy and unclear.
"Two's on that face!" - describes an ugly person
"Two's on those skinners!" - describes exceedingly tight trousers ("that" can be replaced with "those" and "them")
2. two dollar scratchie
When you have a bitter break up or disagreement with your partner and their name becomes a non-speakable word, substitute it for "two dollar scratchie". If anyone says their actual name instead of the substituted "two dollar scratchie" - they gotta buy you one!
"Two Dollar Scratchie" is such an arsehole, I can't believe he cheated on me.
3. Two Theory
When one makes a generalization on something, and there are only two examples in which said event has occurred.
Person 1: "Yeah, that person always sings".

Person 2: "He's only sang at your birthday, and at the store. Two theory".
4. one
One is the loneliest number.

Life isn't easy when two are divided
And one has decided to bring down the curtain
And one thing's for certain
There's nothing to keep them together
-Aimee Mann
In this confusing world of social conformity I feel as if I am only one.
by one Mar 30, 2004 add a video
5. half-struck one o'clock
Term used in the North of England to denote a lack of mental capacity. One of a genre of epithets signifying that a person is 'not all there'.
By 'eck, that cousin of yours acts half-struck one o'clock.
It isn't an act. She really is thick.
6. one-stop poop
the kind of poop where you REALLY got to go, but when you go it's only about one or two poops and you're good for the day
Dave: I really need to take a shit! (goes into bathroom for a minute)
Jon: That was pretty fast!
Dave: Yeah, it was a one-stop poop.
7. One Hitta Quitta
When two people fight and one fighter knocks the other motherfucker out in his first punch thrown
"I got that one hitta quitta"- Three 6 Mafia
"I got in that fight and had a one hitta quitta mayne"
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