| 1. | Can you hear me now? | ||
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The next time that Verizon Wireless guy says this overrought old cliche that has worn out its welcome and was already stale before this shitty decade even began, I'm gonna throw an Ottoman stool at the damn TV and watch an electronic flash as the screen is shattered from the impact. 1. I turn on the TV. It's commercial time beings that a show has just ended. The Verizon guy whips out his cell phone. YES he says it AGAIN: "Can you hear me now?"
"AAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!" #SMASH!# 2. Not only can I hear you now but you're annoying the hell outta me! You'd better shut it up now! |
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| 2. | Legal-Sized TV | ||
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The size of the TV required to be able to read the legal print at the end of a commercials for pharmaceuticals, car dealerships, or infomercials. When Robert finally got a Legal-Sized TV he realized that the medication that he was taking was the reason for his impotence, excessive sweating, and heart palpitations.
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| 3. | disclaimer blindness | ||
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The temporary blindness or other visual problems that occur from trying to read hardly discernible product disclaimers on TV ads. I can't see the program for this lingering disclaimer blindness!
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| 4. | televangelism | ||
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Christian TV ads advertising salvation for the low price of $39.95 per-month (plus $19.95 postage and handling).
See also evangelism Televangelism: "Send me money or you're all going to hell. Amen!"
Jesus save me *from your deciples* |
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| 5. | T.V Ads | ||
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When most men are willing to have a relationship or talk about important issues. When the T.V ads came on I asked Barry if we should consider re-looking at our family finances and why it might be a good idea. Barry seemed to be responsive and conscious to what I was saying until the T.V Ads finished and 'Who Wants to be a Millionaire' came back on.
"I feel like I am living my relationship in T.V Ads!" |
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| 6. | Commercial snack | ||
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When you're watching TV and you get a snack (chips, pretzels, a sandwich, etc.) during a commercial break, only to finish said snack before the commercials end. TV: We'll be back after these messages!
Boris: Shit man, this show kicks ass, but it would kick even more ass with some Fritos. *Boris gets a bag of Fritos* Boris: Ahh those were good Fritos. Holy shit the show hasn't even started!! TV: We're back! (Scrubs resumes) Boris: Ahhh fuck, damn commercial snacks. |
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| 7. | Jabberwatchy | ||
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A stupid word made up by some idiots at an ad firm for the evil cable tv entity know as Comcast. We use ads with stupid words like jabberwatchy to entice low brow customers into paying ridiculous amounts of money for crappy cable service.
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