| 1. | Turd Alert | ||
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An email message sent to your circle of friends at work after the discovery of brown matter that didn't quite make it into the toilet bowl. TURD ALERT … TURD ALERT … TURD ALERT
Alert Level: brown Location: first stall, ladies room Status: uncomfirmed (sorry, even with contacts I can’t identify suspect 100%) MO: inconspicuously positioned to the left side of porcelain goddess; proceed with caution, and avoid stall numero uno at all costs |
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| 2. | Turd Alert | ||
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A courtesy warning issued to a companion while walking that there is, in fact, a turd ahead in their trajectory. Bro, I'm not sure if that was human or dog, but thanks to your Turd Alert, I didn't have to find out the hard way!
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