HUSBAND: "No, I didn't use this John because some asshole left a trophy shit with a big TP plug under it in the toilet. And there's piss all over the seat. And there's no toilet paper! Now, I know it's not their fault this happened, but, if they're not going to monitor and clean and stock their restrooms enough to avoid this kind of a situation, then we can just go to that stop across the street and give THEM our gas and food money."
WIFE: "Okay, let's go!"