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A townie is a person who thinks they is 'ard but ain't. They all speak with a cockney accent. They don't earn a living and get money off of mum and dad, and proberley will for the next 20 years. they don't wear real designer tops they get cheep fake sh*t from the market for £10. they all think they are well hard because they have got mobile phones. they all listen to blazin squad and fake garage crap whick they think is the best in the world. all they say is innit, respect mon, and fuck off u slag. all they can think about is SEX. but about three quarters of them are still VIRGINS. they go out every friday and get out of there face pissed and high on dope they also do that saturday and sunday aswel. they do'nt ever stop shopping at the weekends they always bunk off school. all of the dudes and birds grab each others asses in public and make out infront of everybodys faces because they just don't care about anything these days.
the townie age group usually fall under 13 - 18 if you are still a townie at 18 you have some serious commitment issues and you need to fu**ing get your act sorted out because who wants to be a townie at 18 years old
What do you call a townie in a box?

by Christine Elliott January 14, 2004
15 10
The knobs who not so much as walk down the street, but like to sway, probably coz the size of their brains give them the wrong co-ordinates of which way to walk.
They like to go to the skateparks in groups of 10 or more wearing their crappy "Burberry" caps, most of them will be on bikes, so as to make a quick getaway.
What do ya call a townie with half a brain?.....Gifted
by Parker September 09, 2003
8 3
The old word for chav which, frankly, sounds a lot better and less self-consciously constructed to sound obnoxious by a group of journalists on a slow July nesday.
"Oh great, another pack of townies coming to kick my head in because I don't conform to their world view."
by OD Smith March 18, 2005
11 7
Complete dickheads who think they are the greatest they listen 2 crap r'n'b, rap and all that junk. They will wear horrible bomber jackets, trousers tucked in socks and i tight ponytail or bun 2 show how big thier heads really are
innocent normal kid happens to turn around and faces a townie

"oi ya' littl' bich' whayydya fink you lookin' at eh?!!?

"nuffin i...."

"fuckin' answer me back n i'll bash ur fuckin head in!! yer man innit"
by Townie Slayer January 01, 2005
9 5
ahh townies how i do loath them they even invade the country u d think you d be safe on the isle of wight but no its infested this is most noticeable in the ryde area wher there are alot of "dirty goffiks" as we are lovingly knowen as they spend their friday and saturday nights drinking cheap cyder in the ice rink or crappy pubs at the bottom of the high street and the hanging round outside the royal squadron the "batty goffs" pub looking for a fight. I pity them they are goning to grow up as nothing and live sad lives trying to immitate the bratz doll collection and failing misarbly most of the females look like they ve been used to clean a toilet and the boys look like they got dressed in the dark. What is the constant obbsession with starting on alteritives and goths all we do is sit smoke and try 2 learn at school and they r always homophobic what do they have against gays and bis. townies are a disease and there should be a vacination.
my argument with stupid townie slapper:
townie:r u a goff?
me:no i m jus spectrumly challenged
townie:wha?!?!? u starting
me:no but you have the personality of an apple
Townie:(after long time)but... apples dnt hav personalities
Townie:stupid dirty goffik and ur a dyke 2 u scab
me:yup u gotta a problem
townie:(after bout 5 min) shut up (then walks off looking confused)
by taryn November 04, 2004
11 7
A mindless idiot who wears fake burberry products for £5 of the local market and who has poorly dyed blonde hair and who listens to britney spears and 50 cent etc...they wear fake diamond earings and the girls wear bottoms with 'PRINCESS' or 'BABE' written on the back and the men and women wear jackets with an American state on the front such as 'CUBA' or 'BROOKLYN' on the front. They smoke and say 'innit' and swear in every sentence...how pathetic...they pick on goths and punks and grunges because we are different. well it's better to be different than be like one of the rest of them townie bitches/pimps.
Here is my argument i had with 2 townies (a boy and a girl)
Townie 1: oi mate, ere's one of them sado goths

Me: Ahem

Townie 2:HAHA, lets go get da others. then we can kick her in

Townie 1: Move a muscle and you're dead biatch

They ran off to get their mates and i walked off in to mc donalds to meet my mates.

Why tell us not to move then they run off....?!?

Pathetic Wannabes
by Gem The Weird One October 24, 2004
23 19
A walking waste of skin who excels only in making me and society feel violently ill and disgusted at the mere sight of one and who's only purpose in this world is to make me hate it even more.

Nuff Said.
Townie: Fuckin' dotty gweb
Me: Fuck you.
Townie: You bein' fuckin cheekeh?
Me: Yes, now go away.
Me: Not really no.
*Scum hits me*
*I hit Scum back*
Townie: What da fuuuuuuck
*Scum runs off like a disabled monkey, probably to go crying to his 'Big Brufa' or his 'Cru'*

by Grom July 23, 2004
6 2