15
1. Something that is used to assist with the modification of an object or situation.

2. Something that is used to create or destroy.

3. Slang synonym for the males sexual reproduction whatsit.

4. Someone who does seemingly silly things; often used as a term of endearment, but not always!
I am a tool because I have been used to:
Improve someones ego;
Distract them from the mediocrity of their own existance;
Make someone else jealous;
To improve someones elses relationship (how bizarre);
To get them a valentines day present (this year)

For love.
For happiness.
For laughter.

To do everything for them, and in return:
To accept all of the guilt.
To hold all of the pain.
To take all of the blame.
(It was never a game).

A good tradesman respects his tools!!


A Hammer is a tool both used to create and to destroy.

My penis is a somewhat rusty tool I must admit (only from lack of use!!).

I hit my penis with a hammer while making pancakes (as you do)
That sure modified the fuck out of both the objects involved and the situation:
I created a lot of pain
I destroyed the pancake batter (all over the floor), and my willy - must admit i chipped a bit off of the hammer handle too!!

I hit my tool with a tool; I am such a tool

I do not regret being a tool - my penis however has a somewhat different (slanted) view on the subject

Sunday 02/11/2008
by Luke Warm December 19, 2008
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16
someone who is a complete idiot/ one who is used by other people, and usually dosen't even realize it/ someone who can't think for themselves/ an asshat.
People who wear huge logos on their shirts are tools.
People who listen to Avril Lavigne, are tools.
People who think Sum 41 is a punk band, are all tools.
by Anonymous April 11, 2003
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17
a word used by idiotic scenesters to describe anyone who doesn't fit... unfortunately, they don't realize that by conforming to the indie scene, they are still conforming, and whether they realize it or not, their lives are just as meaningless and externally controlled as the man in the cubicle... and that the people who they are calling tools KNOW that they are being used... they just have half a heart to spend their time helping out the aforementioned fools in hopes that they will see the truth and turn their life around.
fool 1: that kid is a tool
fool 2: I totally know, right? did you know that I asked for a ride to the store and he gave it to me for free?
fool 1: wow... what a tool. he actually HELPED another living being?
fool 2: yeah man, lame... hey, who's frederick kneetshaw?
by barcodeonneck June 11, 2009
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18
1.) One who tries too hard to ingratiate themselves to others, in order to be liked, or to get votes.

2.) Most politicians.
1.) Larry told me what a great job I'm doing again today. He is such a tool.

2.) Congressman (Mark) Green (R-WI) will say anything to get some buzz about his campaign for governor. What a tool!
by Peugeotjoker March 28, 2005
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The vengeful act of crapping on a lover's chest while they sleep.

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19
One of three things:
a. Device used to apply mechanical work.
b. The Band.
c. Someone that is used for another's gain.
d. A penis.
e. Loot spelled backwards.
Bob: Man, that guy is such a tool.
Jim: Yeah, which reminds me, I screwed your wife.
by TheCaffeineJunky December 11, 2006
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20
someone who tries too hard. a poser. one of those chic's who holds the sign saying "Carson Daly is Hot." the asstard who goes to a rock show because they heard one of the songs on the radio or mtv. or someone who insists on wearing velour sweat suits. Avril Lavigne.
Jane is a tool because she dresses like Avril Lavigne while listening to New Found Glory and Dashboard Confessional just becuase Carson Daly told her to.
by sham February 08, 2003
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21
1) Someone who can't think for themselves, changes their mind based on what other people think. Basically an assclown who does not have the mental capacity to form their own opinion.

2) When you meet someone who is that big of a tool, you start calling everyone that person's name instead of tool.

3) People who have a tendency in fantasy sports to depend on other people in order to gain opinions.

4) People who spell their "favorite" team names wrong
1) Tool: "Huston Street to Brew Crew, rumored to be done
Bystander: "Yea Jay sent you this didn't he"
Tool: "Yup"

2) "Quit acting like such a Viggy"

3) So called Expert: "Look for Andruw Jones to have a bounce back year"
Tool: "I think Andruw Jones can have a good year this year."

4) Tool: "Go Red Soxs!"
Tool: "Go Sabers!"
by Baconbits101 October 17, 2008
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It does not matter how you do it. It's a Fecal Mustache.

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