The real spiderman involves slitting a girl's wrist, inserting your penis for satisfaction, and ejaculating to simulate blood clotting (and so the biddy doesn't die).
Matt: Nah, what is it?
Dan: It's when you jizz on your hand and throw it at a chick.
Matt: Nah, bro. The real spiderman is when you jizz in a girl's wrist.
Dan: Dude, that' messed up.