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1.
1) A waste of time. 2) an unsatisfactory gain from a considerable investment. 3) Sexual assault during the course of public higher education. 4) The worst of a bad choice.

A derivation of a longer trueism: "You only go to a large state college to get raped, alcohol poisoning, and a substandard education." The first and the third (of that list) became synonymous with any situation involving getting the lesser two of any three unappealing options.
He went to the University of Massachusetts for four years and all he got was the first and the third.
by Crinkle Fantastic May 04, 2005