| 1. | agency | ||
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(n) casual reference to the Central Intelligence Agency.
Typically used by chucks trying to impress others by implying they work for the CIA. Also used by people with a basic understanding of the intelligence business as a general reference to movie and television characters who are supposed to be spies. Charlene: "Excuse me, do you have the time?"
Chuck: "I'm sorry, I work for The Agency." Moviegoer #1: "Damn, check out ol' boy's suit." Moviegoer #2: "Must be an agency man." |
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| 2. | The Aristocrats | ||
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A joke known mainly among comedians. It is a joke that anyone can make their own. The joke goes as follows: A family goes to a talent agency and asks if they may perform. The talent agent asks what the act is, the family replies (this is where the presenter of the joke may put whatever he/she pleases into it. Usually very disgusting). The talent agent is shocked and asks what the act is and the family replies: The Aristocrats.
The middle is meant to be the funniest and usually involves bestiallity, necrofelia, incest, feces, urine, and other kinds of filth. I guess you could say the point of the joke is to see who can make it the most disgusting. Heres my shot at making it truly disturbing: A family walks into a talent agency wanting to perform their act. The talent agent asks what the act is and they reply: "First my wife and I get naked and proceed to have sex, i then shit in her mouth and make her suck my dick, I then fuck her again and lick the reminents of shit and sperm off of her and spit it in her mouth. Then i cover her mouth with my hand and punch her in the stomach and watch the stuff fly out of her nose. I catch the spray of shit and jiz and blood with my mouth and swallow it hole. Then my daughter comes in and i fuck her in the ass while i suck my sons dick. While this is going on my wife starts banging my father and mother. I then fuck my mother and father while my wife fucks my kids. Then I blow my dads asshole and jerk him off. Then the dog comes in and i fuck it too. I then kill my mother with a gun and fuck the bullet hole. We all join in the blood orgy and piss on one another. We shit in the piss and blood and then puke in it. Then we dump it in a kiddy pool full of dead midgets and aborted babies. We then jump in the pool and bang the hell out of eachother. I chop off my wifes boobs and she cuts off my dick, she sucks my stump and eats my balls. Then 3 midgets standing on eachothers heads come in and we kill them and add them to the pool. We slurp up everything in the pool and puke it on the audience. Then i smash my wife's head with a sledge hammer and cover the audience with her brains gallagh... more...
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| 3. | Vampire: The Masquerade - Bloodlines | ||
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This computer game is chock full of bugs, glitches, an can cause an otherwise normal XP installation go blue screen seemingly at random... Oh, and it has something to do with vampires in L.A. in the World of Darkness or something. Hard to tell with those bugs. The storyline is good, but WTF is an RPG doing on the Source engine? Vampire: The Masquerade - Bloodlines is a steaming pile of spider poo. It's what happens when stupid video game companies (or software companies in general) release their works too early.
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| 4. | agency | ||
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Business or outfit that manages many providers. The agency handles all calls, bookings and advertising. The agency takes a percentage of the fee for each session. That agency has all the cute girls working for them in this town.
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| 5. | The Vanguard | ||
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The nickname for The Federal Vampire and Zombie Agency,which served, hence the name, to protect our country from the undead. Was first established in 1868, and was disbanded 1975, due to the major decrease of undead attacks.
Federal Vampire & Zombie Agency (FVZA),, also known as "the Vanguard," was responsible for controlling the nation's vampire and zombie populations while overseeing scientific research into the undead.(Taken from http://www.fvza.org)
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| 6. | poo nanny | ||
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a household domestic worker with specific duties. in very wealthy homes, children are often assigned nannies for certain tasks, such as dressing, going out, or school. the poo nanny is employed specifically to children being potty trained. her skills ease a child's entry to the world of toilet usage, and good poo nannies are worth every penny they earn. mater: oh dear, i think we need to arrange for a poo nanny for junior, dear. how else will he become toilet trained?
pater: quite so, quite so, my dear. i'll call the agency first thing in the morning. and now, i must return to the factory and lay off a few dozen workers and transfer their duties to our southeast asian plant. mater: you're such a capitalist swine!! pater: that's why you married me, remember? mater: of course!! i nearly forgot!! junior: momma poopie panties yucky gooey mater: oh for christ's sake the little bastard just shit his god-damned pants again!! pater: oh, take another valium, bitch, and get his ass upstairs to his bathroom!! and change your clothes before you come back downstairs; i don't want you smelling like toddler poop. |
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| 7. | Colonel Ghadaffi | ||
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Derived from British army slang, the NAAFI is the agency that used to provide shops on Army bases. During the working day, soldiers would go in for tea, toast, read newspapers etc.
The Colonel, Ghadaffi. Are you coming to the Colonel Ghadaffi for a brew?
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