| 1. | text-ship | ||
|
A blossoming relationship over text messages. Not yet a full blown relationship but heading in that direction. Amy and John have a text-ship right now, so Amy wont leave her phone more than a foot away from her incase John finally works up the nerve to set up a date.
|
|||
| 2. | textual assistance | ||
|
a classier term used by the upper class to refer to "sexting" the act of erotically stimulating another person from a distance via text. text can be in the form of instant messaging, text messaging, passing notes, morse code and even smoke signals. textual assistance is usually used while in a long distance relationship to keep up the guise of a "real" sex life you can discuss with your socialite friends, but also includes leaving sensual messages on your fiancé's corporate satellite phone or dirty post-its slipped to the twenty something secretary of yours you poke while your wife is at charity galas. while textual assistance can be used both to signal a booty call or nudge both parties in the direction of an orgasm...it is an essential part of the elite life. (On a private ship at sea)
Butler : Sir, your mobile just vibrated. It appears to be a text message. *Young heir to Fuzzy Dice empire takes one hand off the wheel of his yacht and picks up the ruby encrusted phone* Maxwell Lucas Hetherington III : Not a text message Boothby, you silly old chap! This is textual assistance from the Princess of Luxembourg! As you can tell by the swelling in my Ferragamo's she's quite the dirty bird that one! Better swing round the cape and take a gander at that crown jewel before the cricket match!" Editor's Note: Scriptwriters for CW's Gossip Girl recently asked for this to be used on their show to expose overweight, multi-ethnic and working class America to the wonders of "textual assistance". Angry gold leafed scrolls flooded in from all over the world to CW headquarters accusing the show of being too "tawdry" and having a multi-racial cast. For fear of losing ad revenues, it was pulled from the script. |
|||
| 3. | gmail | ||
|
A free email service provided by google; still in limited beta trials, and attainable only by invitation, the much coveted gmail service allows for a gigabyte of free storage space and discourages trashing old messages.
The service is paid for by advertisers; google uses an automated bot to read your saved emails (the higher storage capacity means it has more mails to read) and uses keywords it finds in the emails you are viewing to deliver targeted text ads that follow you up and down the page. This slight downfall however is more than compensated for by the vast amounts of storage space, and unheard of attachment size limits. Unlike most webmails, gmail uses javascript much like a flash player instead of HTML to navigate and operate the email; as such, users with certian browsers are unable utilize gmail to it's full advantage. In short, gmail is über all other free email services. Some websites, such as www.gmailswap.com have taken the pursuit of these much coveted email accounts to the next level by letting users bargain or more often beg and grovel for invites. The following example is an i-seek explination of the gmail service and it's effect on other free email providers as was presented four months ago, in July of 2004: E-mail enlightenment – The munificence revealed.
more...
Upon receiving a mystifying e-mail from the Hotmail Staff signifying an upcoming substantial increase in storage and attachment limits, I was immediately suspicious of the veracity of such an unexplainably generous change. Considering that this was in fact a Microsoft owned service, a gratis increase in functionality and convenience was not something I was about to acknowledge unconscientiously. Initially I simply dismissed the concept, and even sent out some e-mail clones of the original message to various people with intent to ridicule it. While the sincerity of the proclamation is still to be established, a knowledgeable individual recently filled me in on the probable reasoning behind it. What he told me led me to believe that not only was it a legitimate Hotmail announcement – but that it could very well be true. While the conversation pertaining to the whole e-mail upgrade was indeed brief, I managed to derive a fair amount of enlightening information from it. Needless to say, numerous questions are still left unanswered – Many of which I will be seeking the answers to in these upcoming weeks. I can only imagine that many of you currently-wired individuals may already know more about it than I do; but for those of you who don’t, the following is what I know now. A new free e-mail service (possibly to be provided by google) is now undergoing beta trial. The service (which my contact referred to only as ‘G-mail’... |
|||
| 4. | Van | ||
|
1. Noun. A hypothetical place that entails sexual activity, often repeated to your friends the next day.
2. Verb. Sexual activity, often repeated to your friends the next day. 3. Question. The questioning of one's sexual activity the previous night. Only one word necessary. Works well with text messaging. 4. Prefix. The begining of any word that you would want to associate with sexual activity. 1. Yo man, I took her to the VAN last night!
2. Dude, we VANned like Cubans last night! 3. Bro #1: VAN? Bro #2: VAN! 4. This fall, when we go to all those weddings, its going to be a great VANtember and VANtober! |
|||
| 5. | Textship | ||
|
When you keep in touch with those you love primarily through texting. "Have you heard from Amanda lately?"
"Yeah, we've been texting like crazy." "Oh, so you're in a textship?" |
|||
| 6. | enthralling tale comrade | ||
|
A variation of "cool story, bro" which acts to serve as the ultimate shutdown to stories the storyteller of which thinks is super awesome, but is actually wasting everyone's time because no one cares. These stories can be heard IRL, or seen often on WoW forums or 4chan. "HEY MAN I WAS PLAYING EVE ONLINE YESTERDAY AND I JUMPED OFF TEH SHIP TO THE GROUND BUT THEN I GOT BARRICADED BY TONS OF OTHER ENEMY DUDES AND THEY ALL CAME RUSHING AT ME LIKE A ZERGRUSH FROM STARCRAFT HOLY FUCK WHAT AN ADRENALINE RUSH"
"Enthralling tale comrade." |
|||
| 7. | conversational Houdini | ||
|
When the person you are talking to via text/msn suddenly disappears, or constantly disappears and re-appears, without offering any explanation. Basically, when the conversation is so damn boring they don't care about manners, and bail ship. Girl 1: God, like, Colm is so totally boring.
Girl 2: Yeah, we were on msn last night, I pulled a conversational Houdini after about 5 mins and didn't even change my status. |
|||
