tele-hell 

1. When you really, really need to speak with a live person at a company, but the computerized call system keeps booting you around.

2. When a computerized call system keeps misunderstanding what you're saying, even when you're speaking super slowly and clearly.

1. (Dialing) "Oh, man, I really need to talk to someone about that $875 pay-per-view charge on my cable bill." "For account information, press 1. For sales, press 2." "No, no, I need a real person!" (Alternately pressing 0, asterisk, and the pound symbol) "Welcome to the outages hotline." Agggggh, I'm in tele-hell!!!" 2. (Dialing) "Oh, man, I really need to talk to someone about fixing my smashed phone." "For technical support, say, 'support.' "Suuh-pooort." "I think you said, 'USB port.' Is that correct?" "No, support! Suuuhhhh-pooooorrrrt!! Agggggh, I'm in tele-hell!!!

tele-hell by WordOfArt July 19, 2010

telefellate 

To flatter, kowtow, and sweet talk a customer into buying something or not returning something on the telephone.

Operator: And, if you order now, we'll give you free shipping. As our best customer, you're also entitled to a free gift.

Dude: I TOLD YOU I'M NOT INTERESTED! Don't telefellate me!

telefellate by This WAS my real name! January 29, 2010

telecell tool 

These are the people that try to get on television and call their friends to see if they're on tv. They wave and smile like the true tools that they are.

John sat in the front row behind home plate at the Indians game and called me to let me know that was him waving. What a telecell tool.

telecell tool by cinti August 24, 2006

telehealth 

a virtual checkup for health-related services through video call or chat

Doctor: Don't forget we'll have a free telehealth next month.
Patient: You mean it's gonna be an online checkup?
Doctor: Yup!

telehealth by timlight December 17, 2020