The media fails to tell you that the only people who have died of this so-called "deadly" virus are:
1) Mexicans with terrible health care and terrible health in general who are living in close quarters.
2) Babies and old people
Note that anyone who has any remote knowledge on disease knows that these types of people die from the "normal" flu, and that the swine flu isn't some kind of deadly disease because it hasn't killed anyone that a normal sickness wouldn't have.
Also take note of the fact that hundreds of people have gotten sick in the United States alone, and yet all of these cases were called "mild". Know that all of these "mild" cases have occurred in adults and/or teenagers, who would not die from the "normal" flu.
What also is failed to be mentioned is the fact that a "Pandemic" is any disease that is spread worldwide. Thus, just because the swine flu is a pandemic doesn't mean we'll all die. The common cold is a pandemic, and no one goes around freaking out about that.
This is another phase in the "we're-all-gonna-die" angst in 50% of the human population. It'll pass by 2010.
Me: Riiight :|
Guy 1: Hey, let's go to Mexico and do drugs for the summer!
Guy 2: Awesome, I'll drive!
Guy 1: *cough*
Guy 2: *splutter*
*Swine Flu kills both*
2. What you accuse someone of having if u hear a cough.
The rest of America: No fuckin shit
Passenger 1: Cough*
Passenger 2: Bitch get the fuck out of here u gots the swine flu
Passenger 1: Ill swine flu ua ass if u dont get the fuck outta my face
No niggah, I got the Swine Flu.
2. The government's plot to seek an alternative route to curing our economical situation by creating unnecessary drama in the field of pandemics that will supposedly spark a large creation of jobs in the cleaning product industry, and a trillion dollar profit margin, thanks in part to our gullibility as humans.
3. The hysterical hockey/soccer moms' excuse for contributing to the closing down of schools across the country, while students come into contact with one another more often outside of school than in school. Don't tell me kids are more susceptible to dying or being harmed from the swine flu as opposed to choking on a hot dog, getting hit in the head with a baseball, or falling off of a trampoline.
4. A future Michael Moore documentary that will be renamed "Pandemic Pandemonium".
5. A pandemic that will surely result in the mass hatred, execution, and genocide of pigs throughout the world.
"Oh my, Bob, you look awfully run down. Are you sure you're alright?" *presses hands to cheeks* "SWINE FLU! EVERYBODY RUN!"
"Bob! They're evacuating the country to Mexico! Everyone's fleeing! This is not a drill! THIS IS A PANDEMIC!" *tornado siren* "Should I tell him that's where it originated? Nah..."