a very advisiable way to handle your problems, because no one loves you. according to maddox of www.maddox.xmission.com here are some reasons to commit suicide. in a handy checklist style of ten. if any apply to you........


1. Do you live at home but your parents are always making you clean your room and do your homework? It's a sure sign that they don't love you and that they want you to kill yourself. Why else would they make you clean your room? What are they going to do next, ground you? Make you wear braces? Don't kid yourself, the message is clear.

2. If you just got out of a bad relationship and you feel like things are never going to get better; you're right. Everyone knows that suicide is the only option, stop procrastinating. Look on the bright side, at least your ex will feel guilty for a couple of minutes--but don't count on it.

3. Depressed? Don't have any friends? I guess nobody told you, but being depressed and feeling lonely isn't normal. Everyone else is happy, and has lots of friends so there must be something wrong with you. Put the prozac away, what you need is rat poison.

4. Spill a drink at a party? Drop a plate of food in a restaurant? Nobody else has to live with that kind of embarrassment; you know what you have to do.

5. Flunked out of college? Don't know algebra? Here's a question you should know the answer to: Flunked out of college + Don't know algebra = Time for _____. Chances are you still don't know the answer, so here's a hint: it starts with an 's' and ends in 'uicide'.

6. Traffic jam? Sometimes bad luck isn't a coincidence. Do you really want to sit in traffic for another half hour? Look on the bright side, if you're a viking you'll be going to Valhalla. Then again, you're probably not, but eternal damnation in hell is probably the next best thing.

7. Telemarketers keep calling? It's easier to hang yourself than to get rid of a telemarketer, am I wrong? If you're lucky, Home Depot might be having a sale on rope. After all, you don't want to die letting people think you weren't frugal.

8. Flu? You realize that there's no cure for the flu, right? Well, no cure that doesn't involve painting the wall with your brains.

9. Flat tire? Do I have to spell it out for you?

10. College application get rejected? Take the hint.

Hope you found this guide helpful, mention it in your suicide note. On second thought, why bother? Nobody will read it.
maddox thinks you should commit suicide
by Johnny Richter February 20, 2005
I'm not really adding anything new here. Suicide is -an- option, it's not the only one, but shouldn't be discounted. Comes down to personal beliefs; for a naturalist there are no repercussions for you - only for those that have formed an attachment to you. For a <insert disapproving religion here>ist it would be inadvisable. There are those that would complain about 'throwing your life away', but for those that believe in non-existence after death, the main overriding factor is your empathy towards those that may be hurt after your death.
'Somebody called me names, I'm going to go kill myself' <- wrong (i'm guilty of that whiny behaviour)

'There really isn't that much point to life, all this work leading up to one single point (death at old age) beyond which everything that I have done is of no consequence. I could 'commit' suicide, although that would be ruining the fun for everyone else' <- at least a bit of thought was put into it.
by don't you respond to me June 04, 2004
something that is, despite what i've seen on here, no laughing matter. suicide can seem to be the only way out, and i'm fighting it off personally right now. it's tempting, yet i don't think i have enough strength or guts to kill myself...hopefully i never will..
Last night, a 15 year old boy committed suicide...
by depressed June 26, 2003
Suicide is the act of a person killing their self. Many people say that suicide is selfish and the "coward's way out". That is pure bullshit. If it really was the easy way out, then everybody would be doing it. What is just as cowardly is living a life you hate just because you don't wanna die. Even if someone is killing themselves, they will never know what is on the other side until they pull the trigger. Eternal damnation? A never ending void? They will never know. That makes suicide a pretty brave thing to do in my opinion. And suicide is NOT selfish. It is selfish of the person that doesn't want someone to commit suicide, but instead have them keep on living and feeling like shit for their own comfort and amusement. Suicide is a choice, and people should not be judged if they get sick of life and want to throw themself off a building.
The people that spew the same "suicide is the permanent answer to a temporary problem" bullshit are the people that don't know what it's like to be depressed. And to the people who call others that commit suicide "cowards": Let's see you try to shoot or hang yourself. Do YOU have the balls to do it?

Please consider someone's feelings before you judge them. Suicide is a completely personal decision. It is NOT a joke.
by Marco K. June 18, 2010
1) To take one's own life because of a)no will to live life anymore, b)problems that seem unsolvable from that person's point of view, and or also c)people who influence the thoughts and actions of one's life inabling them to live for themselves.

2) A drink that consists of three or more types of a beverage.
1) I want to die because I feel that no one loves me and I have no will to live my life anymore.

2) Sprite, Dr. Pepper, and Bacardi makes one hell of a suicide!
by Brittany Prevent-A-Suicide May 25, 2005
Suicide is, very simply ending one's life, often due to some form of stress or pain in the individual's life. Suicide is viewed by some as completely reasonable and by others as selfish.

Certain individuals label suicide as reasonable due to the fact that it negates the pain and suffering an individual may be feeling that may not be tolerable or possible to deal with.

Suicide is also labelled as selfish because it ignores the responsibilities one has to others and the world. This usually falls under the category of those who realise that life is not based on the individual, because if it were jumping off a bridge wouldn't work since you'd land on the 22 story high pile of bodies already there. In this sense, suicide is seen as an escape harming the people close to one's self and adding trauma to their lives.

It is important to remember that many people who attempt suicide are not in fact suicidal and need something as simple as someone to talk to, therefore, judging or institutionalising someone who has attempted to commit suicide will contribute further to their problems.

An anti-suicidal quote: "You can't possibly know if life will get better if you aren't here to live it". That one kept a number of people here.
A form of suicide is jumping off a bridge, or in front of a train, much to the inconvenience of commuters. This form is often a final "screw you" to the world.
1. The act of taking one's own life.

2. A fun game which is played on a handball court. A group of people are further away from the wall, behind the person with the ball. The person in front throws the ball against the wall, while the others try to grab the ball to take over as thrower. If anyone drops the ball in an attempt to catch it, or if it hits your body in any way without you catching it, you have to run to the wall and say "Suicide" before someone throws the ball at you and hits you really hard. If you make a bitch move attempt to deflect the ball so that the other players couldn't get to it before running to the wall, you are punished with "boomps", in which you have to stand against the wall, stick your ass out, and get hit with the ball by every player on the court. The number of boomps and the rules of boomps vary from place to place.
DeSean: "Yo let's play suicide, son! Your ass still sore from when you knocked the ball away last time! Ha-ha!"

Louis: Fuck you!
by Jason Vernon March 18, 2004
an act of taking your own life, usually conceived through extreme emotional distress. Most people call people who act on their decision cowards looking for the easy way out while it is just the opposite, these people who have gone through so much in life they are willing to throw it all away in hope of ending their suffering, which when i thought of it took the most courageous act of ending their lives. While most look down on younger people who go through with this act, while the people who should be looked down on are the people who caused such emotional trauma to the person.
Suicide is a very complex thing that should not be used until all other means of improving your life have been used.
by Take this... May 24, 2009

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