Is a nasty
ass trashy, dirty place in the southwest corner of Missouri filled meth, homeless, with
people with more felony convictions than they have teeth.
People in Springfield are of contradictions. The 6 figure, yuppy wannabe rich classless people eat
ham sandwiches with a cup filled with pepsi, yet they look down at you. People in Springfield are people with no sense of
aesthetic. The girls here are overweight, with badly groomed hair, yet give looks of disgust to anyone who looks in their direction that doesn't look like Brad Pitt. The people in Springfield are overall racist, yet most women have at least 3 mixed race kids out of the 5 kids they have between 5 fathers.
Springfield is a larger place in an area with nothing but empty fields. Secularism is one of the few cosmopolitan qualities that have slipped in, but despite that even the secular population maintain the same protestant melody of exclusion, shunning those in aren't in their group.
Springfield being several years behind everyone thinks craft
beer and IPAs are the coolest thing ever. They're complete try hards. Seeing a
fat, 35 year old
beer dude who looks like a dollar store-version of Seth Rogan are still common sights.Their
music consist of various wannabes who think one day they'll break out by being one of the tons of acoustic guitar guys playing trite songs. Springfield trying to act like they have anything cool going on is like watching a
retarded man pretend to be smart.
Kim Jung-Un: I need to find a
target to drop a nuke on.
North Korean adviser: How about Springfield, MO?
Kim Jung-Un: No, that place looks like its already been devastated.
